The Hash was hosted at the Yellow House up
from Giordano’s on Cross Island Road by Ginger Mark. Brutally hot day it was
and we were threatened with a long run, but with a river crossing. The run was
ostensibly set on flour, but as we soon found out you needed a microscope to
see it. The run went down Cross Island Road, and there the front running
bastards made a big mistake, dodging cars, and missing the turn to the river.
They instead went to the seawall, along and back up via the hospital. The
slower ones led by Godfather, actually found the trail and did do a river
crossing but took a shortcut back. There were plenty of Godfather’s cool
succulent nuts to savour as we awaited the Hash Circle.
POD was GM again, having been in training
for her marathon Marathon. She called those new to Hash forward, and they were
legion. First there was Simon and Richie
who had been brought by Godfather. Then there was apparently the entire
Swinburne Uni from Melbourne.
The retreads were Poumuli (in Bula Land),
Snakebite (working), Speedhumper (busy) and Crime (likely at Tafaigata). Shoe
Inspector Screamer tried but failed, and was joined by Snake who interfered in
her duties (imposting?).
Celebrity Awards went to Mark for Prince
(in the paper) and POD and Lewinsky for Marathon story.
This Day in History Awards went to
Cockblocker (1938 – Douglas Corrigan takes off from Brooklyn to fly the
"wrong way" to Ireland and becomes known as "Wrong Way"
Corrigan), the Swinburne All Black (1976 – The opening of the Summer Olympics
in Montreal is marred by 25 African teams boycotting the games because of New
Zealand's participation. Contrary to rulings by other international sports
organizations, the IOC had declined to exclude New Zealand because of their
participation in South African sporting events during apartheid), Lewinsky (1998
– A diplomatic conference adopts the Rome Statute of the International Criminal
Court, establishing a permanent international court to prosecute individuals
for genocide, crimes against humanity, war crimes, and the crime of aggression)
and Eveready (Feast Day of St Francis Solanus).
Turning to the run, a Hash Mere had
stumbled on the run, and had stopped to wash her hands at the dive shop, and
even scored some antiseptic. Screamer was joined by Richie who had a scooter accident
on the weekend. He hadn’t hit a dog, he hadn’t hit a pig – he had hit the
accelerator! A Road Toast Award to the two of them.
The Host who was also the Hare, had used
such a tiny amount of flour that it must have been the most valuable ever. Gold
Dust Award to Mark. Latecummer Gayboy was welcomed with a down down.
Snake had been sharing his sob story before
the run about ex-rays and pain, when all seriousness aside, the grand
conclusion is that he is getting old. Grumpy Old Man Award to Snake. He was
joined by Il Capo, who as always was whingeing, but this time was actually
sick, yet came to Hash. Dedication to Hash Award.
Opening up for nominations, Snake wanted to
thank Lewinsky for not wasting our beer by drinking vodka. Il Capo nominated
Jessica for always missing the theme, and she was joined by the Hareraiser Nom
Nom for not posting it.
Poumuli nominated CB for forgetting his
son’s food, and then poisoning the rest of the kids with his
konzentrationslager fumes from his truck. Gayboy nominated Snake for Worst Boss
of the Year for sending an employee to fix a gate. Snake said the employee was
more skilled so both took the award.
Mark nominated Lewinsky for his support to
the ginger people, while Snake nominated Godfather to atone for the deploring
state of rugby in Samoa. Lewinsky then nominated POD for breaking the Lalomanu record.
She clarified that she had only done so because of Godfather’s pestering, and
he was of course proud of her.
Non Nom had been out with Peeping Clam’s
gay uncles, when one of them had ordered a vodka tonic, to which the other
exclaimed that this is the gayest drink ever. As it is also Lewinsky’s current
choice, he joined Peeping Clam.
Il Capo was nominated for leaning and
Genora as a latecummer.
Next week will be hosted by Godfather,
Titty Galore and Speedhumper at the Lewinsky compound.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
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