Friday, December 15, 2017

Hash Run 1912

Hope you all recovered from Christmas Hash. 

Hash next week, 18th Dec will be hosted by BB, Swinger and StrapOn at Papauta.

Theme: Heroines

Venue - StrapOn's house: Same road to Mailelani Soap Factory/Le Petite Cafe, it's the second house on the right. The house has a white deck in the front. 

Run starts: 6pm on the dot!

On!On!


StrapOn

Hash Run 1912

Hope you all recovered from Christmas Hash. 

Hash next week, 18th Dec will be hosted by BB, Swinger and StrapOn at Papauta.

Theme: Heroines

Venue - StrapOn's house: Same road to Mailelani Soap Factory/Le Petite Cafe, it's the second house on the right. The house has a white deck in the front. 

Run starts: 6pm on the dot!

On!On!


StrapOn

Hash Trash 1911

The Christmas Hash was hosted by Gayboy at Sunrise Restaurant in Matautu. It had been a really rainy Monday, but we were blessed by a lull in the deluge as the pack set out for what is really a pub crawl. The Hash kids safely ensconced in a red Hilux, the trail went down Beach Road to Amanaki, then back via CVs, OTR and sundry other places. Bemused locals and tourists were regaled by bawdy versions of classic Christmas carols, belted out with gusto and accompanied by Godfather’s ukulele. The pack meandered slightly on the return, but we were finally able to muster a very large and loud circle.

Slim Shady was our GM, and invited the newbies to enter the circle. These were Soopuka brought by Gabby, Tanya brought by someone called Tammy, Paulie, Peter and Taz brought by Skull, Coinsave’s brother, Talai brought by someone called Courtney, and Nicholai Taulelei brought by Poumuli and Wahoo. All got a down down, joined by Titty Galore and Lewinsky.
Retreads were Wahoo (mummying), Captain Bolitos (doing things with balls), Cunning Linguist, Swinger (world tour), Coinsave, Nom Nom, Cunning, Skull, GBH, Gayboy and Captain Mortein.
Shoe Inspector Gayboy found Kiwi and Coinsave’s brother.

Celebrity Awards went to Princess Fantapants, GBH, Gabby, Peeping Clam (all in photos in the paper) and Lewinsky for Sassygirl BJ (numerous stories from Vanuatu Games).

This Day in History Awards went to Captain Mortein (902 – Battle of the Holme: Anglo-Saxon forces are defeated by Danish Vikings under Æthelwold (a son of Æthelred of Wessex) who is killed in battle), Godfather (1996 – Gwen Jacob is acquitted of committing an indecent act, giving women the right to be topfree in Ontario, Canada – GF approved), Poumuli (1997 – The Kyoto Protocol opens for signature), Nom Nom and Skull (2005 – Cronulla riots: Thousands of White Australians demonstrate against ethnic violence resulting in a riot against anyone thought to be Lebanese in Cronulla, New South Wales; these are followed up by retaliatory ethnic attacks on Cronulla), Princess Fantapants (2017 – Marriage Amendment Bill to recognize same-sex marriage passes in Australia) and Pervert (Human Rights Day).

The GM had some awards, and started with POD for a Child Abuse Award for making Happy Feet run all the way from Amanaki. Then there was a Mean Aunty Award to Titty Galore who stopped a couple handholding on the run.

Next Princess Fantapants for the Not So Secret Award – apparently he had been revealing a bit too much of himself in the Santa suit. Karaoke got a Balldropper Award, and Smashlee for asking why run with the kids.

Opening up for nominations, Coinsave quickly got Crime for leaning. Poumuli tried to add in another for Crime, but failed.

Cunning Linguist, piqued that Swinger had been posting all these photos from his world tour, updating the minutiae of his progress, gave him the Rubbing It In Award. He was joined by Coinsave who had also been on part of the tour.

Skull’s son Peter nominated his sister for running in a strapless bra, and running faster than her mascara. Both of them took the down down, while Godfather’s interest was perked. Cunning nominated Snake for hiding in the bushes, joined by Pervert.

Princess Fantapants nonimaned Nom Nom for the Libra Award, as the running colours of his get up suggested immediate ovulation. Noms was joined by Coinsave for leaning.
The GM then recognized Junior and Richard Wetzell who had snuck in to the Hash. Karaoke gave the Master Chef Award to Crash Bandicoot. Lewinsky was supposed to get a pig, and got a cow instead. Both Crash and Lewinsky had a down down, with Soopuka for leaning.

Coinsave then asked for a Subterfuge Award for Cockblocker – he has been walking around with a black eye and giving different reasons each time asked. Transporter and Lowrider got the Missed Retreads Award. Swinger nominated Coinsave for giving influenza to an entire cruise ship.

Smashlee tried to nominate Captain Bolitas, but named Paul instead, but in the midst of this failure Godfather asked for Happy Bunny to join because of her smile when Captain is on shore. Prince was asked the rhetorical question, why the facial hair? Burt Reynolds Award.
Gayboy nominated Captain Mortein for the down down he hadn’t had yet, but this was false, so both took it. They were soon joined by chattering nabobs Gabby and Soopuka.

Godfather made an impassioned speech about not missing 30 odd years of Christmas Hashes. This was followed by the Pricks of the Year Award – Poumuli for missing the birth of his son, and Nom Nom, Godfather and Snake for the dead cat and pig run. Tit of the Year Award went to POD for her excessive running.

The Hare and Host were saluted. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all.

On On

Poumuli, IKA Slit

Monday, December 11, 2017

Hash Run 1911 - Christmas Hash

Talofa all
Tonight's Christmas Hash will be hosted by Gayboy at Sunrise Restaurant in Matautu. Come on down to the home of sweet and sour cat for some carolling and fun. Its locate by the Samoa Ports Authority building.
Run starts at 6 PM rain or shine.

On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit

Hash Trash 1910

The Hash was hosted by the King and Karaoke in Lotopa. It was an incredibly rainy day, so it was surprising that so many actually made it out. The rain had precluded any sort of trail to be set, so StrapOn volunteered as live hare. Out the gate we went on a perambular run around Lotopa, with the faster runners going all the way over to the Mormon temple and back.

StrapOn came in as GM, and called the circle to order. New to Hash was Gabby who is a UN volunteer, and came with someone called Pru and Mark. Down downs for Peeping Clam, Princess Fantapants and Gabby.

The retreads were Poumuli (away in Fiji and Germany), Overstayer (in Savaii but based in Upolu now), Witch Doctor, Tom, Crime, Peeping Clam and Princess Fantapants.
Shoe inspector Snip and Tuck failed, as she falsely accused POD.
This Day in History Awards went to StrapOn for Gayboy (977 – Emperor Otto II lifts the siege at Paris and withdraws. His rearguard is defeated while crossing the Aisne River by Frankish forces under King Lothair III), Crash Bandicoot (2006 – Commodore Frank Bainimarama overthrows the government in Fiji), King (1726 – King Adolph of Sweden dies), and Lewinsky (International Day for People with Disabilities).

Celebrity Awards went to Princess Fantapants (for FBI who was in the paper), Godfather and Cockblocker (SVS in the paper), Peeping Clam (not happy about Prince Harry), Lewinsky (30 year anniversary of RLS, of which his dad was a founder), the King (did not enter world’s best guacamole competition), and Cockblocker for World Aids Day.

Turning to the GM’s awards, we saw some improvements in the 7s, with vocal support from Karaoke. Then there had been the Queen’s Baton Relay, with numerous indiscretions including Sassygirl BJ driving too slow, Godfather taking a short-cut, POD running in front of the Baton-bearer and Poumuli trying to us the baton as a bat.

Opening up for nominations, Princess Fantapants nominated Peeping Clam for the Not Samoan Award, as she was peeling more than a chimpanzee from her sunburn. Then Lewinsky nominated the GM for his speedy side step of a charging dog on the run. Lewinsky joined him as he had been laughing about the incident.

POD nominated Titty Galore for her nesting skills in fashioning a sling for Godfather out of a bikini top. Lewinsky nominated Crash for the bad son in law award for not wearing pink to the run. POD had been listening to the radio when the bodybuilding contest was on, and apparently the commentary from the ladies watching would have been illegal if men had uttered them during Ms Samoa. To top it off, the King had been abused by Karaoke upon her return from the contest.

Godfather noted that the Hash has been around for 30 odd years, and that a long time ago at a Togitogia run Snake had found a snake in the bush, for which he is named. This week they found a snake at Sinalei, and after that was disposed of, he began to look for the parent snakes. Then he remembered that Snake had been his electrician.
Princess Fantapants joined him for sitting during this story. Finally, Karaoke nominated Snake for getting upset that someone called him old at last week’s Hash.

The Hosts and Hare were saluted. Next week’s Hash is at Sunrise Restaurant, Christmas Hash 6PM, rain or shine.

On On

Poumuli, IKA Slit