The Hash was hosted at On The Rocks by
Lewinsky and POD in the absence of a suitable host. Cockblocker was live hare
and took us on a jaunt on the seawall to Mulinuu, back into town and on home
through the back roads of Apia. Not the most interesting run, but whatever.
There were sweet nuts awaiting.
POD called the circle to order, trying to
be heard over the infernal catervauling of the OTR band. There were no newbies
or retreads. While Richie was fined for leaning, Shoe Inspector Snakebite
struck gold with Prince.
This Day in History Awards went to Poumuli
(1030 – Ladejarl-Fairhair succession wars: Battle of Stiklestad: King Olaf II
fights and dies trying to regain his Norwegian throne from the Danes), a
British
Medic (1900 – Kaiser Wilhelm II makes a
speech comparing Germans to Huns; for years afterwards, "Hun" would
be a disparaging name for Germans), Snake (1970 – Black Tot Day: The last day
of the officially sanctioned rum ration in the Royal Navy), StrapOn (1976 – In
New York City, David Berkowitz (a.k.a. the "Son of Sam") kills one
person and seriously wounds another in the first of a series of attacks), Crash
Bandicoot (World Hepatitis Day) and Lewinsky (International Beer Day).
Celebrity Awards went to Coinsave (for pro
and anti Sinalei stories), Nom Nom (for Snatched story), POD (for being the “darling
of Samoan running”) and Poumuli (for giving his real name to the WHO Expanded
Special Project on the Elimination of Neglected tropical diseases).
On the run Mark and Coinsave ran past his
building and he didn’t pay homage, while Mark was chasing Danielle. POD joined
for being vindictive. Screamer was nominated for partying wildly on the south
side.
Snake nominated Lewinsky, as he had asked
for an extension cord at OTR, and it was so filthy he had to unlock it somehow,
and somehow broke something. Anyway both of them took the award as it was
incomprehensible. Prince gave the hero
award to Lewinsky for his role in the paddling regatta and the provision of an
after race keg. He then tried to blame Titty Galore and went from hero to zero,
but she joined in.
Nom Nom nominated POD and Lewinsky who as
last week’s hosts had not provided us with a safe space for Hash. Because THERE
WERE PEOPLE HAVING SEX IN THEIR TOILET. In the end it was agreed that this must
have been Nom Nom and Peeping Clam.
StrapOn nominated Poumuli for Wahoo’s FB
posts about pregnant women needing to have sex every day. He then nominated
Godfather for showing off his tattoo to someone from the Suva Hash that StrapOn
had met in the Port Vila Hash.
For the 50th Anniversary of the
Peace Corps, Eveready and Louisa were nominated. Peeping Clam made Mark join
them for having made out with one during the celebration party. Crash was made
to join for looking Mexican.
The Hare and Hosts were saluted and then
PIZZA!
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
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