Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Hash Trash - 1479

Your scribe is back again and will try to be better than my useless assistant scribe in relating what happened. Well, the day looked like it was going to be a wet one, and SOTB had warned on the blog that we would get soaked. However, the sun was shining on Taumeasina as the pack arrived. Our host Probona had no idea where the trail went, so our only information was that paper and flour had been used. Off we went down the track to the main road. Poumuli and Mr Whippy leading the charge but soon overtaken by Pussysnatcher, Will, Strangler and Morten. Strangler found the first trail off the main road and took us on a scramble through some fales and over the dike at the back (we have been here before). Through the bushes and into another residential area, Morten quickly picked up the trail with Will and we headed back to the four corners near the UNDP. No false trails, so far, but that changed on the other side of the crossing, and the pack returned for the On Home. All in all a pleasant road run with a bit of bush. Several hashers jumped in the waters off Taumeasina, despite warnings from Swinger about poisonous fish.

POD our GM got the circle started by breaking tradition to wish AC/DC a pleasant trip to Aotearoa for a medical. She welcomed the newcomers to Hash, namely Melissa who is staying with Strangler and Mad Hatter. There were so many rethreads that the GM limited pathetic excuses to those from over seas. These were Bin Garden from NZ, who was here during the jazz hashes, and Larry and Mandy from Oz. Others were Sid the Tall Maori, Delicious, Slippery, Poumuli, etc.

The GM awarded the Hasher in a Rush Award to Godfather for forgetting to lock his door before coming to hash. She had also spotted two chariot riders on the run - Probona and Eveready, and Eveready had to step in to help her with the down-down. The GM then recounted how most hashers had given respectful compliments to her and Happy Feet during the run, except for Larry ("Mama mama susu") and Poumuli (requesting a chariot ride) so two Inappropriate Behaviour Awards were given. Seema, who had been on probation for drunk and disorderly behaviour, had held a party on the weekend during which she skinny-dipped with boys!

Celebrity Awards were given to Gabor (climate change poster boy), Swinger (accusing the government over the new dock), and POD and Lewinsky (double for front page fish). Sid and Gordon Ramsey had to assist with POD's award. But boy was Lewinsky slow in doing his!

As the GM called for nominations, Snake was quick off the mark to target three leaning ladies - Ring Ring, Probona and Wahoo. Sid got Probona's name wrong and had to join in.

SOTB noted that while Slippery had been photographing the hash, he had also been taking photos of his own chest, and that he was wearing Greg-like tight skimpy clothing. The GM agreed that this warranted a double Indecent Exposure Award although Slippery felt it should be a Sex Bomb Award.

Rebecca had been invited to a pool party but had forgotten to bring bathing bottoms, but Melissa had to be her whipping girl.

SOTB rambled on about observing Strangler trying to suss out the trail but there were sufficient witnesses to call this a False Accusation, so both of them got the award after a vote. Poumuli got Pussysnatcher for Excessive Training Award during the SPREP Fun Run.

The GM recounted how Eveready had been to Australia and had been turned down for citizenship due to contracting food poisoning from kangaroo meat (yes, apparently!). Eveready defended himself by stating his doctor's advice not to put low-grade fuel in a high-end engine.

Slippery excused himself from having missed hash, but given that he has been diagnosed with cancer has a valid reason. He wanted to present an award to Godfather who gave up 28 years of avoiding chariot-riding to accompany Slippery, and Godfather accepted the framed gift.

Eveready reminded that he would be a judge during the Perimeter Relay, and encouraged the Hashers that have entered to be the best-dressed team in memory of Desirable.

SOTB showed the GM that he had been repeatedly texted by Kiwi, but the GM couldn't be bothered. Instead she accepted Eveready's nomination to Tony Blair for the Cold Food Award - he had sent his food back to be heated up causing a delay for the dinner companions of over half an hour! The GM called forth Probona for her Birthday Award, then the hares - Lewinsky and SOTB. The hosts were officially Mr and Mrs Lewinsky, although Mrs L did her down down in wine (haven't seen that before).

Check the blog for next week's run.

On On,

Poumuli.

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