Hash 16 May 2016
Hosted by Ill Capo - no scripture seems to have eventuated, but we must surely record the naming of Black Swan, Firstcummer, Loose Lips, Pusiapa, Angry Bird and little Marco Polo.
Hash 23 May 2016
With Pumouli still overseas and yours truly just returned, it seemed the right thing to do to volunteer as the scribe – we couldn’t possibly have two more runs off the record!
This hash was at Eveready and Karaoke’s place, and the theme pink as usual there. What was unusual was the length of the run: 9km set! We started a bit late, and so most of us took a shorter route to return before dark when the nuts and keg were waiting.
The grand circle counted 33 heads, with newcomers Prue and Barry from EnZed, Screamer from Oz, and Ruby, Grace, Sarah and Connor from the YouKay, plus Wendy from the YouEsOfA? It proved worthwhile to have trained introducees in hash rules, as HotNuts had to take a double and ACDC a single for their non-hash names being used in vain by these newcomers.
Many retreads this month: ACDC, Godfather, Karaoke, Eveready, Mr Whippy and Prince – in all excuses their families played a big role as you would expect. Shoe inspector Firstcummer did not take long to point the finger at Cunning Linguists whose neon laces had already provoked much glee before. In the absence of Pomouli, any relevant historic events were simply ignored.
Sort-of celebrities were the Joseph Parker and referee lookalikes Prince and Godfather, a car crash pointed the finger at Crash, a suicide-by-??? to Swinger and TV appearance by Devine were all good for down-downs, as was Strapon for some obscure reason. Referring to the Rugby 7s, Sarah appeared most closely linked to Scotland and Godfather to Fiji, although ACDC got a downdown relating to “my history” whatever that item in my notes means.
Nominations from the floor came from Il Capo to Eveready for setting an impossibly long run which had however been set by Crash; yet-to-be-named Phil for being a bad artist (having his elei printing destroyed by the housekeeper rather than him ironing it himself); and for Swinger for ignoring the run-setter’s shout that he was going the wrong way.
Sassygirl nominated Firstcummer and GM for noisy wining and dining, which was reciprocated to Sassygirl for her liking the shapes of empty winebottles too much. What do we make of this, I wonder!
Firstcummer nominated a three musketeers award to Godfather, HotNuts and Swinger for rescuing some of her Marguerita that went flying, the glass with ¼ content caught by Godfather and some of the spilt juice being licked off thighs by HotNuts - who gave an impressive theatrical impression of what had gone on in the public eye. And Swinger? He had gallantly footed the bill…
Sassygirl also nominated Black Swan as the longest person standing at a party and then wanting to take a taxi in pursuit of a friendly driver to go out with. Il Capo nominated Lewinsky for no longer wanting to drink beer, but his drinking of wine resulting in dangerous movements towards the loo – his effort to reciprocate with a “peeping Tom award” failed. Mr Whippy nominated Crime for the Good Samaritan award, ie for reminding of the all-important pink outfit. Lewinsly nominated Eveready and Karaoke for setting a bad example by leaving their weed out to dry – which is a Crime of course. Apparently “It was an experiment”! Well this was all going on a bit long but whatever.
Hops got a double downdown for firstly not stepping forward as a retread and secondly for forgetting his hash name when paying hash cash! Was it really that long ago (or Alzheimer’s)? - but at least he paid. Sassygirl nominated Screamer (from Oz) as an imposter for our own absent Screamer.
Eveready then took the floor to announce the birth of his granddaughter Maya (number four, plus a grandson but he admitted losing track of). A head-wetting toast was combined with that for the Hare (Crash) and both hosts (Eveready and Karaoke).
But it wasn’t over yet, as all those not wearing any pink (in honour of the hosts’ daughter Luanna, whose favourite colour this had been) got to do a few push-ups, another opportunity for HutNuts to show off while some others suffered. Upon complementing Delicious on looking deliciously slim, Godfather did a swash performance of our favourite “Wise men say..” in a tight circle of swinging singers. One to remember – if it wasn’t for all those down-downs!