Thursday, December 15, 2016

Hash Trash 1859

The Hash was hosted by Do Me Twice, Babyblocker, Greg and Chez at Moamoa. There were several difficulties in finding the place, and the run being set on paper was a wet slog after the massive rain. We went down the trail from the house and on to the road, leading down to the Tokelau compound. It was obviously a false trail, but we thought maybe something had been found – alas with a huge grin AC/DC stood by the huge paper cross, the bastard. We went back on to the Moamoa road, and followed it around, chased by snarling dogs. We couldn’t find the trail after a bit, so we used the old AC/DC trail.

POD was our GM as usual, and there were none new to the Hash. The retreads were DMT (bad virus), Clark, Tall Story (or Erectus Maximus), and Chez. Nom Nom had to take one for being called Numb Nuts by Clark.

Shoe Inspector Silent But Deadly failed. We also greeted latecumming retreads Cockblocker and Curly. CB had another one for making us start the run late.

Celebrity Awards went to Slim Shady (closest living relative Prince), Lewinsky (his godfather was in the paper at the Parker fight) and Nom Nom (photo with Oz Minister and the PM). Clark was added in for again calling him Numb Nuts.

This Day in History Awards went to Cockblocker (1642 – Abel Tasman reaches New Zealand), Snake (1907 – The worst night of the Brown Dog riots in London, when 1,000 medical students clash with 400 police officers over the existence of a memorial for animals that have been vivisected), Witch Doctor (1911 – Roald Amundsen's team, comprising himself, Olav Bjaaland, Helmer Hanssen, Sverre Hassel, and Oscar Wisting, becomes the first to reach the South Pole), Silent But Deadly (2008 – Muntadhar al-Zaidi throws his shoes at then-U.S. President George W. Bush during a press conference in Baghdad, Iraq – presumably to get him to drink from it – shoe  inspector fail), Lewinsky (Human Rights Day and International Monkey Day).

The GM’s awards started with Pusiapa for flashing her students as a farewell, followed by a Fail Award to Curly for the trail and CB for not helping out.  Pusiapa had also been yawning and hiccupping, and admitted having taken shots with a priest. Lewinsky was added for inaudible reasons.
StrapOn was nominated for not wearing a strap on, as well as Sunny Side Up for calling him an impossonator. On the run, we had gone through a vicious dog area, and StrapOn had kindly waited to ensure that all got through. Poumuli was the last, yet he managed to silence the dogs. He got a Dog Whisperer Award, joined by StrapOn for Smelling Like A Bitch’s Ass.

Also on the run, Lewinsky had displayed undue athleticism by suggesting the pack run over the river to reacquire the trail. The GM then turned to Tall Story, who is an avid landscape gardener, but not a decorator, hence the GM’s dismay at the display of a rat trap, saw and a Rabitohs sign.
The big news of course was the Parker-Ruiz fight, so Clark repped Parker, Venom repped Ruiz, and Prince the dismal head of NZ Boxing. In relation to the fight, StrapOn had been invited to Lewinsky’s, but the moment he sat down the TV broke – some sort of PMP reaction. Poumuli had to join him for being a Sony shareholder!

Pusiapa had gone to SBD’s matai title ceremony, and had been asked repeatedly if she was his wife, sister, wife etc. Anyway Mailo SBD got the award, but his faletua was added in.

Do Me Twice, on setting the run with Curly and Babyblocker, reported that Curly had said they should do this every week. But it turned out they had set the run with Babyblocker on the bonnet! It was agreed that DMT should take this, as well as CB for not preventing it.

The next one involved StrapOn and Pusiapa discussing tattoos and spanking, the result being StrapOn for the spanking and Pusiapa for calling him daddy. DMT then nominated Tall Story for forgetting the gas for the bbq, and making mum go get it, and he was joined by Poumuli for wasting time on a silent but deadly joke.

StrapOn nominated Snake for the after-Hash drinks – he had been pouring from a bottle and nothing was coming out, but the cap was on. Not Coming Award.

Nom Nom our Hareraiser, noted that he relies on good clear directions from the hosts, and in this case it was an abject failure by DMT. However since a correction had been forwarded by the GM, Nom Nom joined her.

We then farewelled Pusiapa with the Hash Anthem, and saluted the Hosts and Hares.

No host yet for next week so watch the blog or FB posts.

On On

Poumuli, IKA Slit

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