Friday, May 24, 2013

Hash Trash 1673

The Mothers Day Hash was held at Tafatafa Beach hosted by Godfather and Titty Galore. It was a beautiful setting but we have had experience with Godfathers runs on the holidays and the heat was palpable. The pack set out along the beach to the west, then cut up to the access road leading to the main road. The trail headed further down the road, and there were some false trails, but the brave hashers found their way back to the beach and returned along the beach from the east. Those who had braved the run were absolutely drenched. Your Scribe had opted for a stroll this time with Amalia and Wahoo, which was still hot! 

The GM SOTB called the circle to order, and invited the newbies to step forward. These were Allen and Kath from AKL, brought by Ladyfinger, and Matt from Fiji who was brought by Chanel, so down downs for all as well as CB. The Rethreads were Wahoo, Poumuli, Do Me Twice, Anita, Flash Gordon, Stiletto, Dave, Rachael, Darren and Ally. All lame excuses all around, but sunnies for Dave and Rachael.

Celebrity awards  – Dawn Raid for Capt Mortein (Mortein ad), Swinger for Uncle Fred’s wife Cyn (nice photo in paper), Flash for FBI (also in paper), and Kate for being on radio
This day in History 1310 – In France, fifty-four members of the Knights Templar are burned at the stake as heretics. – SOTB also deserves being burned at the stake

1926 – The Italian-built airship Norge (means Norway) becomes the first vessel to fly over the North Pole – Poumuli equally full of hot air
1965 – The Soviet spacecraft Luna 5 crashes on the Moon. Wahoo
St Blessed Imelda Day – Imelda da Welda

The GM did his special awards, and for Mother of the Year, a certain Hash mere had attended a Hash celebration, and when another mere said she wanted to bring the pizza back for the child, was told “f@#k the baby”- Sassygirl BJ. Then there was the hasher who has started to get a grey patch and found a handy solution in his wife’s boudoir – Waterproof Mascara Award to Lewinsky.

Husband of the Week Award went to Darren who took a one way trip to NZ and had to come back for the kids. A special award was offered up for a mere whose bikini was being offed – closest living relative to Titty Galore Lewinsky took this one.

A Dedication to Hash Award went to Overstayer, Russell, Kate and Josh for going to Pago but changing their flight to get back in time for Hash. There were several birthdays to celebrate – Flash Gordon, Sassy, Summer, Lucy and Rachael.
A special gift was offered up for our resident grumpy git Tallyho, a t-shirt with just such a caption. Darren was also relieved for being able to hand over the Angry Bird award to a person he considered to be a grumpy git, namely Dawn Raid.

Witch Doctor told the overwhelmingly sad story of Poumuli and Wahoo leaving the laptop behind at the airport when they went to Fiji. Tallyho then brought forth the Hash Shrine and started ejecting things, waving his arms in the air and talking bollocks– that is testiculating. After much confusion some item was added by Flash Gordon. 

Tallyho gave the We Are Not A Sporting Club Award to CB for holding the pack together. He also tried to give an Anticipatory Pleasure Award to Kate for something that turned out to be a false accusation. Josh was given a Clean BBQ Award by Sassy. Irini made him stay in the middle with a Father of the Week Award for changing next to the toilets, but was made to join after POD pointed out that Irini was forever whipping stuff off.

Swinger demanded that the Kiwis be given a down down for the 7s and this went to David, Darren and CB.
Finally a new award was introduced, the Pig Hat, and this should be given for porcine activities, such as rooting, but went to Lewinsky for a lack of rooting!

The hosts and hare were saluted and we had ourselves a grand feast.

On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit

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