Thursday, January 28, 2016

Hash Trash 1813

The Hash was hosted by Jill and Alex in Vaivase, close to where we had run from Cunning Linguists. In an effort at redemption, CL had offered to co-hare with Alex, and redeem he did. Well up to a point. We ambled down the road from the house at a leisurely pace, with the marks being easy and regular. Then they became more sporadic, and the front runners were at a loss as to whether this was a false trail. However, eagle-eyed Nom Nom, no doubt firstly searching for dogs with the intent to nom-nom him, spotted a check circle down the road. Several followed him and did a check, and acquired “a” trail. A frantically waving CL called us back. We had found the trail, but from whence it emerged out of the bush. So following after CL we went down a bush track and some steep river slopes into a stream. It was heavily pebbled so running it was tricky, but at least it got us some shade. Because when we emerged back on the road and Nom Nom’s check, all semblance of cloud cover had simply vanished. And we now faced running uphill, albeit somewhat gently sloping, under an unrelenting sun. The combined effect of no wind or shade and a baking road made us look like we were already having a shower. A brave pack made it up and around Vaivase, before coming down to the rugby field and on home. Godfather’s trusty nuts had been chilled, and it was only heat exhaustion that prevented their earliest opening and suction.

POD was present as GM, and called the circle to order. There were none new to Hash, but we had many retreads – Karl, Offspring, Karaoke, Kat, Press Stud and Mona. Ring Ring was appointed Shoe Inspector and failed.

Celebrity Awards went to StrapOn for Mr Whippy (story in paper about kids learning to code), Godfather, Titty Galore and Lewinsky (on tv for the Parker fight) and Sassygirl BJ and Karaoke (for photos in the Observer).

This Day in History Awards went to Samantha (1788 – The British First Fleet, led by Arthur Phillip, sails into Port Jackson (Sydney Harbour) to establish Sydney, the first permanent European settlement on the continent. Commemorated as Australia Day.), StrapOn (1960 – Little Joe 1B, a Mercury spacecraft, lifts off from Wallops Island, Virginia with Miss Sam, a female rhesus monkey on board), Witch Doctor (1995 – The Norwegian rocket incident: Russia almost launches a nuclear attack after it mistakes Black Brant XII, a Norwegian research rocket, for a US Trident missile) and Lewinsky (1998 – Lewinsky scandal: On American television, U.S. President Bill Clinton denies having had "sexual relations" with former White House intern Monica Lewinsky).

Turning to the run, the GM decided that CL had indeed redeemed himself, and was given the Blissed Redemption Award for his efforts, and was assisted by Alex as she was wearing a most unhashmanlike shirt that stated that “Monday has been cancelled, go home”.

The GM also congratulated Faumina for running in Samoan workboots, or jandals, as well as for breaking three pairs of running shoes in a month. A What The Hell Were You Doing Award in other words.

Opening up for nominations, Poumuli nominated Shitbags for actually doing the run for the first time. Shitbags wanted to warn all the Hash Meres of a childbearing age of the Zika virus, and no sex for two years, but instead this earned him a Potential Cockblocking Award.

Poumuli also wanted to nominate Slim Shady for the Driving Like Dawn Raid Award, but this backfired when she claimed to not be drinking and nominated him as her Whipping Boy. Pirate Princess then nominated Mona for a Birthday Award and for “being her bitch for 12 years”.

Slim Shady nominated Jill for revealing that she had not been a rugby fan until she came to Samoa, while the GM called for a rep to do a Parker Award. All of a sudden she recalled that one of the Hash Meres had been extolling her kick-boxing skills in the gym, which were so formidable that she injured her hand punching the air. Karaoke got the Not Bruce Lee Award.

The Hares and the Hosts were saluted and we had a wonderful spread of pasta that included a rabbit option. Next week’s run will be hosted by Faumina, and it will be her last for a while. Watch the blog for details.

On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit

No comments:

Post a Comment