The Hash was hosted by Jill and Alex in Vaivase, close to
where we had run from Cunning Linguists. In an effort at redemption, CL had
offered to co-hare with Alex, and redeem he did. Well up to a point. We ambled
down the road from the house at a leisurely pace, with the marks being easy and
regular. Then they became more sporadic, and the front runners were at a loss
as to whether this was a false trail. However, eagle-eyed Nom Nom, no doubt
firstly searching for dogs with the intent to nom-nom him, spotted a check
circle down the road. Several followed him and did a check, and acquired “a”
trail. A frantically waving CL called us back. We had found the trail, but from
whence it emerged out of the bush. So following after CL we went down a bush
track and some steep river slopes into a stream. It was heavily pebbled so
running it was tricky, but at least it got us some shade. Because when we
emerged back on the road and Nom Nom’s check, all semblance of cloud cover had
simply vanished. And we now faced running uphill, albeit somewhat gently
sloping, under an unrelenting sun. The combined effect of no wind or shade and
a baking road made us look like we were already having a shower. A brave pack
made it up and around Vaivase, before coming down to the rugby field and on
home. Godfather’s trusty nuts had been chilled, and it was only heat exhaustion
that prevented their earliest opening and suction.
POD was present as GM, and called the circle to order. There
were none new to Hash, but we had many retreads – Karl, Offspring, Karaoke,
Kat, Press Stud and Mona. Ring Ring was appointed Shoe Inspector and failed.
Celebrity Awards went to StrapOn for Mr Whippy (story in
paper about kids learning to code), Godfather, Titty Galore and Lewinsky (on tv
for the Parker fight) and Sassygirl BJ and Karaoke (for photos in the
Observer).
This Day in History Awards went to Samantha (1788 – The
British First Fleet, led by Arthur Phillip, sails into Port Jackson (Sydney
Harbour) to establish Sydney, the first permanent European settlement on the
continent. Commemorated as Australia Day.), StrapOn (1960 – Little Joe 1B, a
Mercury spacecraft, lifts off from Wallops Island, Virginia with Miss Sam, a
female rhesus monkey on board), Witch Doctor (1995 – The Norwegian rocket
incident: Russia almost launches a nuclear attack after it mistakes Black Brant
XII, a Norwegian research rocket, for a US Trident missile) and Lewinsky (1998
– Lewinsky scandal: On American television, U.S. President Bill Clinton denies
having had "sexual relations" with former White House intern Monica
Lewinsky).
Turning to the run, the GM decided that CL had indeed
redeemed himself, and was given the Blissed Redemption Award for his efforts,
and was assisted by Alex as she was wearing a most unhashmanlike shirt that
stated that “Monday has been cancelled, go home”.
The GM also congratulated Faumina for running in Samoan
workboots, or jandals, as well as for breaking three pairs of running shoes in
a month. A What The Hell Were You Doing Award in other words.
Opening up for nominations, Poumuli nominated Shitbags for
actually doing the run for the first time. Shitbags wanted to warn all the Hash
Meres of a childbearing age of the Zika virus, and no sex for two years, but
instead this earned him a Potential Cockblocking Award.
Poumuli also wanted to nominate Slim Shady for the Driving
Like Dawn Raid Award, but this backfired when she claimed to not be drinking
and nominated him as her Whipping Boy. Pirate Princess then nominated Mona for
a Birthday Award and for “being her bitch for 12 years”.
Slim Shady nominated Jill for revealing that she had not
been a rugby fan until she came to Samoa, while the GM called for a rep to do a
Parker Award. All of a sudden she recalled that one of the Hash Meres had been
extolling her kick-boxing skills in the gym, which were so formidable that she
injured her hand punching the air. Karaoke got the Not Bruce Lee Award.
The Hares and the Hosts were saluted and we had a wonderful
spread of pasta that included a rabbit option. Next week’s run will be hosted
by Faumina, and it will be her last for a while. Watch the blog for details.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
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