Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Hash Trash 1550

(Ed note - many thanks to Assistant Trainee Co-Scribe Screamer for the report. She has seriously benefited from her remedial English classes and may soon graduate to Adjutant Co-Scribe. Photos from Slippery will be posted soon. On On Poumuli, IKA Slit)

Hash 1550 looked like it was going to be yet another aborted event, what with a massive rainstorm sweeping across Apia town. However the two-keg promise combined with Hash being hosted at a bar seemed to do the trick - a small, but hardy group of Hashers turned up complete with wet-weather gear.

Cockblocker, newly returned from a sojourn in New Zealand, was live hare. Everyone took off along the waterfront, through Vaiala, around Apia Park, out by the UN road, through the village with all the dogs and back out along the river to the main road. A nice rapid run.

GM was Sassy Girl Blow Job.

She called the circle to order and invited up New Boots. There was one – Yasu from Japan who said she had not run but had come to drink. This was received well by the circle and Yasu showed that she is fit to stay.

Rethreads were numerous, few with any really good excuses – Jenny, Screamer, Snake (sheep shagging), Venom, Snake Bite, Dogfood (first time back in 8 years), Ninja (having a baby), Slippery, Dev (tired of everyone), Josh and CB (newly made Uncle).

There were two new shoes but Godfather reminded everyone of the infections that had resulted from the last run in Apia’s puddles and the circle grudgingly allowed Kiwi and Ninja leave from imbibing from their not-so-shiny shoes.

Dogfood was awarded for living up to his name and being attacked by a dog not too far into the run.

Snake and Dogfood were both awarded for some story long past whence Snake had run over a dog that Dogfood alleged had attacked him…turned out it was the wrong dog.

Chiliandrina (who had had to leave due to parental issues) and Zsa Zsa were given the foster parents award for taking on a host of children – Kiss My Butt, Carin, Ophelie and Josh also shared their drinks with their parents.

Clare was leading the GM astray by offering her cigarettes and Dev who wanted to borrow the cigarettes, both got awards.

Two more awards to Josh who had backed into someone’s car and to Wane who insists there in no “y” in his name (someone did suggest adding a “hi” in there somewhere though).

Titty Galore was given the special Prick award (we are still pondering this one) for going home late one night.

Floor was opened for nominations.

Snake’s award backfired when he nominated Godfather for not being on the news when he was back home with his mother. Snake took this on behalf of his mum.

Screamer and Kiss My Butt received awards for pranging Screamer’s car while KMB was on duty watching for strange objects in the back.

Greenie received one for something.

KMB started to put forward an award which was foiled by a slip of her tongue in naming someone called James. Then she took another because she was wearing sunglasses on her head.

Dev had Telephonus interruptus.

Wane was wearing kneebraces and Clare apparently did not like this. They both got an award.

Assistant Trainee Co-Scribe wonders if GM might not have been a tad under the weather herself when she gave out the Tit Award to Greenie for…failing to read the weather signs and bringing the impacts of Climate Change to Apia. Greenie took it like a man. More or less.

After this, things pretty much got out of hand as GM was caught smoking red-handed DURING the circle and nominations flew without apology.

The Hosts and the Hare were thanked – Jay, Patrick, SOTB and CB…they drank then all fell down in a huge dramatic wrap up of the circle.

On On

Screamer

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