Talofa Hashers
As announced at the last hash, Vai Vai and Moa have set up a new adventure for the Hash. Its a regular biathlon every Saturday at Taumeasina Reserve. Its a combined swim and run, run 400m, swim 300m, run 1 km, swim 300m, then run 400m!
If you are interested, the entry charge is $2, it starts at 3 PM this Saturday, so bring your swimmers, goggles, runners, shorts and t-shirts and get ready for a new experience. But enter at your own risk.
Vai Vai has asked for some helpers, who will not have to pay the entry fee. He has asked that we include a request for anybody with a paddle board, kayak or canoe who could help us out as water marshall to please contact him on 759-7998. And also that we would appreciate volunteers for timekeeping, recording and road marshall.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Friday, January 06, 2012
Hash Run 1604
TGIF all Hashers!
Slight change of plans, as Cockblocker will be leaving early the next day.
So, Monday's run will be hosted by Do Me Twice and Cockblocker at Y-Not. The theme will still be Drunken Sailors, as CB and 9'er are off on the Va'a shortly. It will be a BYO food and BBQ, so please bring something along to share.
Y-Not is located close to the wharf, next to Paddles restaurant.
Bring your Hash Cash as there will of course be a keg!
Also a reminder to those who can, come out to the horse races on Saturday for some great fun.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Slight change of plans, as Cockblocker will be leaving early the next day.
So, Monday's run will be hosted by Do Me Twice and Cockblocker at Y-Not. The theme will still be Drunken Sailors, as CB and 9'er are off on the Va'a shortly. It will be a BYO food and BBQ, so please bring something along to share.
Y-Not is located close to the wharf, next to Paddles restaurant.
Bring your Hash Cash as there will of course be a keg!
Also a reminder to those who can, come out to the horse races on Saturday for some great fun.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Wednesday, January 04, 2012
Hash Trash 1603
The Hash was hosted at ACP, the Foundation of Samoa, by Uncle Fred. It had been a cool day, so the weather seemed good for a run around Vaitele. Unfortunately, it was SOTB who was to be the Hare, assisted by Tooth Fairy, so of course they took the easy way out and set the run with a car! This meant that we had some far between blobs and the run was set away from the direction of traffic. Anyway, it was out onto Vaitele Street, with a lot of confusion and no once found the trail initially. Finally a trail was found, but it meant a long false one for Pussysnatcher. He was all the way up the hill past Yazaki when he found the cross. Back we went through some industrial site and then up the next parallel hill. Same stuff but shorter, followed by another false trail about halfway to the Faleata golf course! Anyway, back down the hill past beloved Vailima and On Home. There were so many newcomers that Godfathers sweet nuts could not possibly provide succour to all in attendance. But we survived. Uncle Fred arrived with his usual fanfare and SOTB called the circle to order.
There were a heap of newcomers to Hash, Tony from NZ, Morgan, Imogen, Lulu and Trish from Mexico, and Equator, Tom, James and one guy who got Godfather’s name mixed up with that of a Joey, so Godfather had to take the down-down. The rethreads were also numerous, so apologies if I missed any – PS, Jaycey, Kat, Ted, Nelson and Fred. Excuses were too lame and carbon-footprinty.
Celebrity Awards went to Snatch (her Mom in paper again), Mrs Slippery, Godfather, Poumuli, Cockblocker, Do Me Twice and Fang, but I cant remember who did the closest living relatives for Frances and Fang.
This Day in History, we had 1950- the Stone of Scone abducted to Scotland (went to Witch Doctor), 1862 - largest mass hanging in US history (PS and visiting Americans) and the Feast Day of St James the Just (Swinger). Then there was the nice photo from the Observer of Godfather and Titty Galore that Snatch had had framed.
New shoes were found by Shoe Inspector Tallyho, so James and Morgan bravely drank from theirs. The shoes did not look like this:
The GM then started his awards by describing how a Hasher had gotten pissed off his nut on the weekend. This one went to Poumuli.
Opening up for nominations, Sassygirl BJ was quick off the mark with nominating Greenie for the Crime Award – coming to Hash with no Hash Cash. James nominated Tallyho for being a Wikipedia of Hash Lore, which he gratefully accepted in the spirit of passing on his vast knowledge to new Hashers. CB suggested that they should both take one, which was agreed. The GM then remembered he had asked the latecummer Sam to bring the BBQ, which it was not even though he has a truck replete with siren and flashing lights – Incompetence Award to Sam.
Poumuli nominated some of the young new runners who had brought a rugby ball along on the run – innocent bystanders may get the wrongful impression that we are some sort of sporting club! All the boys drank.
Kat nominated Poumuli for inviting people to a Christmas dinner then getting pissed and falling asleep before the food came. This was doubled as not all of Hash had been invited! Tallyho then ranted in about the weasel weak voices of the Front Running Bastards CB and Captain Mortein, and although close to an FBI award for himself, it was a most amusing rendition of the angry mad person living under a bridge. In the end all three took the Need Voice Lubrication Award.
Sassy nominated James for his academic achievement with a new doctorate, and while this should have backfired (Hashers should be notoriously lax in their academic adventures, at least if we look to the current crop as examples), James took it well.
Nelson nominated the entire group that he had come with for thinking they would not have any fun, and while the subsequent Haka wouldn’t have frightened a finch, they knew how to skull. Sassy also nominated Jaycey for getting the first part of her malu done. Snatch nominated Uncle Fred for butchering the Hash Song (he was actually being quite funny), and he was joined by Godfather. Uncle Fred then extended his usual standing invitation to the Hash to use the Foundation of Samoa, ACP, for future runs.
Sam nominated SOTB for mucking up arrangements for last week’s hash, so a First Time in History Award. Witch Doctor nominated Poumuli for abandoning her and Wahoo at another Christmas Party, but this time there were enough brain cells to counter with a “that was Hashmanlike behaviour”, which did the trick. Sam was caught with cellphonus interruptus, which was doubled as Sam had not gone home to his wife, instead partying with Jaycey. This one also included CB. Sam got the GM back for using his VERTS creds at night.
Tallyho then led the Hash in a most graphic rendition and performance of the Hash Anthem, before we saluted the hosts and the hares.
We have no venue set for next week as yet so watch the blog.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
There were a heap of newcomers to Hash, Tony from NZ, Morgan, Imogen, Lulu and Trish from Mexico, and Equator, Tom, James and one guy who got Godfather’s name mixed up with that of a Joey, so Godfather had to take the down-down. The rethreads were also numerous, so apologies if I missed any – PS, Jaycey, Kat, Ted, Nelson and Fred. Excuses were too lame and carbon-footprinty.
Celebrity Awards went to Snatch (her Mom in paper again), Mrs Slippery, Godfather, Poumuli, Cockblocker, Do Me Twice and Fang, but I cant remember who did the closest living relatives for Frances and Fang.
This Day in History, we had 1950- the Stone of Scone abducted to Scotland (went to Witch Doctor), 1862 - largest mass hanging in US history (PS and visiting Americans) and the Feast Day of St James the Just (Swinger). Then there was the nice photo from the Observer of Godfather and Titty Galore that Snatch had had framed.
New shoes were found by Shoe Inspector Tallyho, so James and Morgan bravely drank from theirs. The shoes did not look like this:
The GM then started his awards by describing how a Hasher had gotten pissed off his nut on the weekend. This one went to Poumuli.
Opening up for nominations, Sassygirl BJ was quick off the mark with nominating Greenie for the Crime Award – coming to Hash with no Hash Cash. James nominated Tallyho for being a Wikipedia of Hash Lore, which he gratefully accepted in the spirit of passing on his vast knowledge to new Hashers. CB suggested that they should both take one, which was agreed. The GM then remembered he had asked the latecummer Sam to bring the BBQ, which it was not even though he has a truck replete with siren and flashing lights – Incompetence Award to Sam.
Poumuli nominated some of the young new runners who had brought a rugby ball along on the run – innocent bystanders may get the wrongful impression that we are some sort of sporting club! All the boys drank.
Kat nominated Poumuli for inviting people to a Christmas dinner then getting pissed and falling asleep before the food came. This was doubled as not all of Hash had been invited! Tallyho then ranted in about the weasel weak voices of the Front Running Bastards CB and Captain Mortein, and although close to an FBI award for himself, it was a most amusing rendition of the angry mad person living under a bridge. In the end all three took the Need Voice Lubrication Award.
Sassy nominated James for his academic achievement with a new doctorate, and while this should have backfired (Hashers should be notoriously lax in their academic adventures, at least if we look to the current crop as examples), James took it well.
Nelson nominated the entire group that he had come with for thinking they would not have any fun, and while the subsequent Haka wouldn’t have frightened a finch, they knew how to skull. Sassy also nominated Jaycey for getting the first part of her malu done. Snatch nominated Uncle Fred for butchering the Hash Song (he was actually being quite funny), and he was joined by Godfather. Uncle Fred then extended his usual standing invitation to the Hash to use the Foundation of Samoa, ACP, for future runs.
Sam nominated SOTB for mucking up arrangements for last week’s hash, so a First Time in History Award. Witch Doctor nominated Poumuli for abandoning her and Wahoo at another Christmas Party, but this time there were enough brain cells to counter with a “that was Hashmanlike behaviour”, which did the trick. Sam was caught with cellphonus interruptus, which was doubled as Sam had not gone home to his wife, instead partying with Jaycey. This one also included CB. Sam got the GM back for using his VERTS creds at night.
Tallyho then led the Hash in a most graphic rendition and performance of the Hash Anthem, before we saluted the hosts and the hares.
We have no venue set for next week as yet so watch the blog.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Hash Run 1603 - 2nd Jan 2012 - ACP Compound - Vaitele
Afternoon All,
Apologies for not having a run last week. Hope you have all recovered from the change of days/dates and you didn't miss out on too much when we skipped Friday.
This weeks run will be a BYO Run at ACP (Apia Concrete Products) in Vaitele. Run will start at 1730Hrs and we have managed to get a Keg for Monday. We will be at the back next to the big Shed so please park around the back.
Dont forget your $15 hash cash and see you all then.
On On
Apologies for not having a run last week. Hope you have all recovered from the change of days/dates and you didn't miss out on too much when we skipped Friday.
This weeks run will be a BYO Run at ACP (Apia Concrete Products) in Vaitele. Run will start at 1730Hrs and we have managed to get a Keg for Monday. We will be at the back next to the big Shed so please park around the back.
Dont forget your $15 hash cash and see you all then.
On On
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Samoa loses a day and switches sides of the Dateline
After switching sides of the road to drive on in 2008, Samoa is making waves again in the global media as we countdown to losing a day come midnite tonite, 29th December. It has been approved that Samoa will switch from the eastern side of the dateline to the western side thereby effectively making Samoa the first country to see the sunrise each day. We kinda liked being the last country to see each day, and don't see the need to rush into another one!!! O yeah, we are taking our brothers and sisters on Tokelau Is., with us on this journey given that their main administrative headquarter is located in the city of Apia.
Trade-wise, it makes a lot of sense given our biggest trading partners are Australia and New Zealand, well if and when they sporadically allow exports citing phytosanitary restrictions etc., Let's not forget Asia as well and more specifically big brother China. China exports are flooding the local markets with their cheap goods. Samoa's accession to WTO means more imports which will greatly increase the trade deficit whilst we continue to be studied, surveyed and reviewed to kingdom come, as to how to increase agriculture production for the export market. The manufacturing sector will continue to have its woes where others get on with building their businesses and others continue to talk grandiose ideas of what can be done and how to do it, if only someone will give us the money to make it happen!!!!
Another plus to the change is the removal of confusion in the tourism industry!!! As one who has been in this industry, i can't recall the number of times, people messed up their bookings because they didn't realise they were arriving yesterday after they left Aussie or NZ today!!! How the heck does that happen??
Our country is so generous that all the employees will also be paid for a day that doesnt exist and they did not work!!! Whilst all employees don't have any qualm with this arrangement, the poor private sector is again hit with another non productive cost that they did not budget for.
There has been a lot of expressions of disappointment and others have reached new heights of "pissedoffedness" that they will miss out their birthdays and anniversaries.
It is but a day, but it still means something to everyone! So happy Birthday/anniversary to those that will miss theirs for 2011 and let us hope that 2012 will be a bit kinder to our country and our people!!
And a thought to end the year, let's shift side of the equator!! Some may ask, why the hell would we want to do that for?? Well it really is simple..."because we can do it!!!"
Trade-wise, it makes a lot of sense given our biggest trading partners are Australia and New Zealand, well if and when they sporadically allow exports citing phytosanitary restrictions etc., Let's not forget Asia as well and more specifically big brother China. China exports are flooding the local markets with their cheap goods. Samoa's accession to WTO means more imports which will greatly increase the trade deficit whilst we continue to be studied, surveyed and reviewed to kingdom come, as to how to increase agriculture production for the export market. The manufacturing sector will continue to have its woes where others get on with building their businesses and others continue to talk grandiose ideas of what can be done and how to do it, if only someone will give us the money to make it happen!!!!
Another plus to the change is the removal of confusion in the tourism industry!!! As one who has been in this industry, i can't recall the number of times, people messed up their bookings because they didn't realise they were arriving yesterday after they left Aussie or NZ today!!! How the heck does that happen??
Our country is so generous that all the employees will also be paid for a day that doesnt exist and they did not work!!! Whilst all employees don't have any qualm with this arrangement, the poor private sector is again hit with another non productive cost that they did not budget for.
There has been a lot of expressions of disappointment and others have reached new heights of "pissedoffedness" that they will miss out their birthdays and anniversaries.
It is but a day, but it still means something to everyone! So happy Birthday/anniversary to those that will miss theirs for 2011 and let us hope that 2012 will be a bit kinder to our country and our people!!
And a thought to end the year, let's shift side of the equator!! Some may ask, why the hell would we want to do that for?? Well it really is simple..."because we can do it!!!"
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Hash Trash 1602
The Hash was hosted at Swinger’s house in Siusega by Swinger and BB. The run we were forewarned was a long one, and so it came to pass. Two long false trails were needed before we began to ascertain the deviousness of the Hare in using flour to set the trail. We ran up the hill towards the Orator, then through some back roads and familiar bush until we finally emerged on Aleisa road. At this point we came down to the sports facilities, and the unshaded road was blisteringly brutally hot. Were you born on the sun, was a question oft asked of Swinger, who to his credit was tagging along. So through the facilities we went, past the golf clubhouse, and that is where the Short Cutting Basterds started peeling off. For your Scribe the camel got broken by the final straw of seeing Tallyho in the distance move to the botanical gardens. Dehydrated and steaming, and with the assent of SOTB, we simply turned in an up by the horse race track.
Well done Swinger, torturer in chief, you can get a job in Syria! Good preparations for the pending Christmas feasts.
SOTB was too tired and emotional to be GM, so by popular demand we asked our irrepressible yet highly combustible Pom Tallyho to step in. This can be a mistake sometimes! He berated the stolid crowd for their perseverance in doing the run, meaning those basterds who did the whole thing! There were none new to Hash, but the Rethreads were BB, Mana, Swinger’s dog and Cockblocker. Mana forgot her hat, so had to re-do.
Celebrity Awards went to FBI (in the paper), Vai Vai (mentioned in letter to Editor), and Pat (modelling). These were taken by closest living relatives, Sam, Sexpot and CB, the latter for his penchant for dressing up. Mana joined in for having been on TV as a former Miss Samoa.
This Day in History went to Offspring (armed wing of ANC founded in 1961), Horny Ho (its Feast Day of Our Lady of Expectation), SOTB (in recognition as the only non-human in Hash for Human Solidarity Day), Seismic (1642 Tasman lands in NZ) and Lewinsky (2007 - to get a Lewinsky is given an entry in the US Concise Dictionary of Slang).
A wedding anniversary had been held this week, and Sassy was saluted, although when she said she wanted a small one, the GM retorted tartly that he hoped that hadn’t been the situation on her wedding night!
Turning to his practice of asking for a run report, he asked (actually lectured) the two front running basterds where the run actually went. This caused great consternation from CB and Sexpot who had been berated about it for quite a while. After much ado, with DMT trying to implicate Swinger, the two FRBs took their award at the insistence of the GM. However, they deliberately spilled their beer on him, and for this sacrilegious act of GM abuse they were made to re-do. All behind the GM moved aside until they were done!
Tallyho recounted how Christmas was such a festive season but during the 1600 run we had tried to cheer up the most miserable bastards, etc. sitting outside that place of ill repute On the Rocks. Lewinsky tried to defend himself by bringing in SOTB on the issue of the miserable git status of his old man, but this got nowhere.
Opening up for nominations, DMT wanted to give SOTB the Fun Nazi Award for shushing them away during the Friday Bluesky Fireworks. Turned out that SOTB was only the Skipper, and it was the Fire Chief himself who had been yelling. Since that is Sam’s boss, he got the Adhering To Fire Safety Award, but was joined by SOTB.
Witch Doctor was chided for letting the small child Pirate play with her cigarette pack, and she shared the Child Endangerment Award with Seismic. A Terrible Parenting Award went to Captain Mortein, thanks to SOTB, for making same child slave away with the food and nearly getting run over in the driveway (by Sassy by the way!). Sassy saw that one coming and quickly nominated the Scribe for being too drunk and leaving his notes behind at the 1600th (she stole them!).
Sexpot recalled that we had had this wedding anniversary noted already, but wanted a Good Son Award to SOTB for his extreme filial affection in arranging that fireworks to coincide with the celebration of his parents nuptial bliss. Sassy nominated the two hashers who had refused to be named, Hideo and Yoko.
Offspring in her own timid way, asked the whole Hash to do a down-down for Springbok. Recognizing that the keg was sagging the GM and Godfather took that one, while we all cheered to Springbok and for her hasty return to hashing with us.
The GM, suitably revived and lubricated now, suddenly remembered that our theme had been red and green for Christmas, and called for the two matching couples Captain and Pirate, Swinger and BB. DMT had been running with Offspring, and she had asked what the On On shouts were all about. She thus also wanted to nominate Godfather for not explaining the rules properly. Poumuli helpfully disagreed, that Godfather should not be held culpable, as Offspring has the attention span of a small rodent. For some inexplicable reason this caused an outcry, resulting in a down down for all three.
Sexpot had been having some trouble getting advertising space in the paper, since Bluesky had dominated all the pages recently. While this was deemed too close to commercial business, which is outside of Hash, the GM relented when Horny Ho told the heart rendering story of her visitors being blocked by a Bluesky car. As the sole representative of that telephonic outfit, SOTB reluctantly stepped forth.
Poumuli nominated BB for only going to the Suva Hash twice in all the time she has been there. In her defence she called the Suva Hash a bunch of old farts, which was an ill-advised tone to take with Tallyho, stalwart that he is of the Suva Hash! Compounding it was the fact that when several Apia Hashers went to Suva, we could only meet up with BB in a bar!
Swinger informed the Hash of the sad news of a fellow hasher being seriously injured on Friday. Ben is in the hospital with a badly broken leg, but is recovering. But the one Hasher who heard first and went to check up on him didn’t tell anyone. Incommunicado Award for Captain Mortein.
CB had been listening to former President Clinton at a Summit in Abu Dhabi – nice speech, but he demurred on a question because “he didn’t have his aide with him”. Missing in Action Award to Lewinsky.
The GM picked up on the jet setting earth saving work of CB, and asked Poumuli to join him in a Carbon Footprint Award. Sexpot then spotted Swinger’s cleaning our rivers t-shirt, which all agreed was misadvertisement. This was followed by a Dumbass Award to Sam for parking outside the Hash Gate and calling to ask for directions. Witch Doctor tried to get a rebuttal in regarding the ciggie butts, since Swinger had refused to put out any ashtrays, and SOTB spotted the GM leaning. The GM therefore hastily closed off proceedings and we saluted the hosts and the hare.
We have no idea where we will run next week, although a suggestion was made that we could have it before the Horse Races. Stay tuned to the Blog
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Well done Swinger, torturer in chief, you can get a job in Syria! Good preparations for the pending Christmas feasts.
SOTB was too tired and emotional to be GM, so by popular demand we asked our irrepressible yet highly combustible Pom Tallyho to step in. This can be a mistake sometimes! He berated the stolid crowd for their perseverance in doing the run, meaning those basterds who did the whole thing! There were none new to Hash, but the Rethreads were BB, Mana, Swinger’s dog and Cockblocker. Mana forgot her hat, so had to re-do.
Celebrity Awards went to FBI (in the paper), Vai Vai (mentioned in letter to Editor), and Pat (modelling). These were taken by closest living relatives, Sam, Sexpot and CB, the latter for his penchant for dressing up. Mana joined in for having been on TV as a former Miss Samoa.
This Day in History went to Offspring (armed wing of ANC founded in 1961), Horny Ho (its Feast Day of Our Lady of Expectation), SOTB (in recognition as the only non-human in Hash for Human Solidarity Day), Seismic (1642 Tasman lands in NZ) and Lewinsky (2007 - to get a Lewinsky is given an entry in the US Concise Dictionary of Slang).
A wedding anniversary had been held this week, and Sassy was saluted, although when she said she wanted a small one, the GM retorted tartly that he hoped that hadn’t been the situation on her wedding night!
Turning to his practice of asking for a run report, he asked (actually lectured) the two front running basterds where the run actually went. This caused great consternation from CB and Sexpot who had been berated about it for quite a while. After much ado, with DMT trying to implicate Swinger, the two FRBs took their award at the insistence of the GM. However, they deliberately spilled their beer on him, and for this sacrilegious act of GM abuse they were made to re-do. All behind the GM moved aside until they were done!
Tallyho recounted how Christmas was such a festive season but during the 1600 run we had tried to cheer up the most miserable bastards, etc. sitting outside that place of ill repute On the Rocks. Lewinsky tried to defend himself by bringing in SOTB on the issue of the miserable git status of his old man, but this got nowhere.
Opening up for nominations, DMT wanted to give SOTB the Fun Nazi Award for shushing them away during the Friday Bluesky Fireworks. Turned out that SOTB was only the Skipper, and it was the Fire Chief himself who had been yelling. Since that is Sam’s boss, he got the Adhering To Fire Safety Award, but was joined by SOTB.
Witch Doctor was chided for letting the small child Pirate play with her cigarette pack, and she shared the Child Endangerment Award with Seismic. A Terrible Parenting Award went to Captain Mortein, thanks to SOTB, for making same child slave away with the food and nearly getting run over in the driveway (by Sassy by the way!). Sassy saw that one coming and quickly nominated the Scribe for being too drunk and leaving his notes behind at the 1600th (she stole them!).
Sexpot recalled that we had had this wedding anniversary noted already, but wanted a Good Son Award to SOTB for his extreme filial affection in arranging that fireworks to coincide with the celebration of his parents nuptial bliss. Sassy nominated the two hashers who had refused to be named, Hideo and Yoko.
Offspring in her own timid way, asked the whole Hash to do a down-down for Springbok. Recognizing that the keg was sagging the GM and Godfather took that one, while we all cheered to Springbok and for her hasty return to hashing with us.
The GM, suitably revived and lubricated now, suddenly remembered that our theme had been red and green for Christmas, and called for the two matching couples Captain and Pirate, Swinger and BB. DMT had been running with Offspring, and she had asked what the On On shouts were all about. She thus also wanted to nominate Godfather for not explaining the rules properly. Poumuli helpfully disagreed, that Godfather should not be held culpable, as Offspring has the attention span of a small rodent. For some inexplicable reason this caused an outcry, resulting in a down down for all three.
Sexpot had been having some trouble getting advertising space in the paper, since Bluesky had dominated all the pages recently. While this was deemed too close to commercial business, which is outside of Hash, the GM relented when Horny Ho told the heart rendering story of her visitors being blocked by a Bluesky car. As the sole representative of that telephonic outfit, SOTB reluctantly stepped forth.
Poumuli nominated BB for only going to the Suva Hash twice in all the time she has been there. In her defence she called the Suva Hash a bunch of old farts, which was an ill-advised tone to take with Tallyho, stalwart that he is of the Suva Hash! Compounding it was the fact that when several Apia Hashers went to Suva, we could only meet up with BB in a bar!
Swinger informed the Hash of the sad news of a fellow hasher being seriously injured on Friday. Ben is in the hospital with a badly broken leg, but is recovering. But the one Hasher who heard first and went to check up on him didn’t tell anyone. Incommunicado Award for Captain Mortein.
CB had been listening to former President Clinton at a Summit in Abu Dhabi – nice speech, but he demurred on a question because “he didn’t have his aide with him”. Missing in Action Award to Lewinsky.
The GM picked up on the jet setting earth saving work of CB, and asked Poumuli to join him in a Carbon Footprint Award. Sexpot then spotted Swinger’s cleaning our rivers t-shirt, which all agreed was misadvertisement. This was followed by a Dumbass Award to Sam for parking outside the Hash Gate and calling to ask for directions. Witch Doctor tried to get a rebuttal in regarding the ciggie butts, since Swinger had refused to put out any ashtrays, and SOTB spotted the GM leaning. The GM therefore hastily closed off proceedings and we saluted the hosts and the hare.
We have no idea where we will run next week, although a suggestion was made that we could have it before the Horse Races. Stay tuned to the Blog
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Hash Trash 1600
The Hash was hosted out at the Snake Pit, and we had a jolly good turnout. Tallyho was dressed up as Santa (Bad/Skinny/Mean – take your pick!) and proceeded to climb up on the Fire Truck with assorted kids and parents too lazy to run. We set off first to Amanaki, where we sang for what appeared to be the entire Japanese contingent in Samoa. On we went to Cappuccino Vineyard where the pack serenaded all and sundry in the streets, and we were joined by Pirate Princess skipping off from work. On on we went to On The Rocks, where the guests were not too happy for the interruption. We stopped off at Aggie Greys, where Godfather led the Hash in a moment of silence and a prayer for good health and continued blessings for the Grey family in this time of distress for them. It was then down to Paddles and the Marina, followed by a stop at Y-Not. Since most of the Hashers had not heeded the call to take it easy on the down-downs, the run back was a sorry affair, with many struggling to keep up with the rabbit feet of Vai Vai, Crime and Mike who were leading going back in a very athletic display.
SOTB our GM had made it back from Pago just in time, and while somewhat frazzled called the hash circle to order. This was not going to be easy with sheer numbers that we had present, including screaming kids high off all the lollies that Tallyho had scattered about. First off SOTB thanked all the sponsors – Aqua Samoa, Westpac, Pure Blonde, Sinalei, Vailima, Y-Not for their generous support, especially for the cool new Hash shirts. He also thanked the Fire Department for bringing the truck.
The GM then called forth those new to Hash – there was Pati, Sam, a friend of Steve’s, a friend of Tiger Woody – too many, will need to look at the Hash Cash sheet to clear this up! The same thing with the Rethreads – I counted in Do Me Twice, Ali, Soprano, Seismic, Tooth Fairy, Swinger, but lost track after Auntie Bev. Could not hear what the excuses were – choice between light to write by, or screaming kids!
New Shoes were found on Karaoke, who under protest drank them clean with much aplomb.
This Day in History we had Michael being crowned Eastern Roman Emperor in 1041, and in 2006 Monica got her MA in psychology. There was also the 1941 declaration of war by Hungary on the US – that worked out real well for them! Closest living relative to Zsa Zsa was deemed to be Captain Mortein, surprise. But Lewinsky had his own retaliatory list of historic dates, and dobbed in Pirate Princess (for the Captain), Tallyho, Tiger Woody, Ninja, Poumuli, and I can’t recall who got the Oldsmobile going off the market to be non-discriminatory against old people – check the photos from Slippery!
Celebrity Awards went to Vai Vai (letter to the Editor) and Ring Ring (on TV). Some firemen who arrived late were given a taste of hash. The GM then sought to honour one of the Hash Teams that had participated in the Perimeter Relay, and those present were joined by closest living relatives to receive Das Boot! Cocktails on the Rocks team – Mike, Captain Mortein, Josh, Alan, Swinger, DMT and Horny Ho. It was a struggle to complete the task but they did it.
Turning to the GM’s Awards, he had noticed that there was a star missing from the Southern Cross in the new Hash Logo, so the Prime Minister Award went to Slim Shady. A Showing Off Award went to Vai Vai and Crime for running so fast at the end. The GM had also been watching TV in Pago, and had seen a dance crew from On The Rocks that were frankly poofters, and thus awarded Lewinsky the Gay Sponsor of the Year Award. Poumuli felt strongly that the GM should join in for watching a gay TV channel while overseas, but this was sadly reversed, and he was joined by loud chattering nabobs Rottweiler, Kiwi and Soprano.
On the run back the GM had noticed that Santa had joined in the running, and Tallyho defended this by saying he was bothered by all the chariot riding and the lack of suitably aged Hash Meres to sit on his lap. In another GM award, a Hasher had left the keg tap open – dumbass award to Mike. The GM then called on the Band of Angels team to try their luck at Das Boot, which they did in 45 seconds, much speedier than that other lot. Crime apparently had been doing his bit for internationalism – that is partying with the Christchurch Hash Meres, so they all got a special Hash gift thanks to Ring Ring, who joined them in the down-down. But before that the Christchurchers in turn had a gift for Crime, even though two of them had dropped out, and for some reason the girls got the glass prick.
Opening up for nominations, Poumuli nominated Tallyho for the Bad Santa Award for encouraging dysentery by dropping the lollies in puddles. Tallyho defended this practice vigorously, that he was only trying to toughen up their immune systems. After a vote, Tallyho succumbed.
Slim Shady nominated the GM for dedication to duty for coming back on time for the Hash, and for some reason Witch Doctor joined in. Princess of Darkness nominated Snake for hosting this 25th Anniversary of Hash in Samoa, and got the GM to join in for not mentioning this earlier. POD had also been updating the run lists, and had found that Captain Mortein had come to the most runs in 2011.
Tallyho nominated Seismic for not chiming in on the carol singing. Then for the Annual Awards, we had Celebrity of the Week of the Year Award was then given to Godfather, Sassy and Poumuli (need to check up on that one next year!). Front Running Hash Meres of the Year went to Ring Ring, Moa, Beck and Nicole. Front Running Hasher of the Year went to Cockblocker (through DMT), Captain Mortein, Vai Vai, with the add-ons of Lewinsky and SOTB for their Perimeter Relay performance. Most Down-Downs for the Year Award went to Captain Mortein, while Hashers with most Unexcused Absence Award went to Poumuli, Slippery and Titty Galore. The Best Run of the Year Award went to Snake. Hussy of the Year Award went to Horny Ho, and Prick of the Year went to CB, and this was taken by Sam.
At that point the Apia Hash Mad Monk appeared, and called forward Beck, who henceforth shall be known as Desperate Housewife. Mike was also made to kneel, and he shall henceforth be known as Sexpot.
Unfortunately Hideo and Yoko declined the honour of being named, probably something lost in translation.
Mismanagement was called forth and saluted, followed by the Hosts.
All in all this was a great celebration for Apia Hash – 25 years and 1600 runs. While having that amount of additional people and that many kegs was a recipe for disaster, we managed to pull it off and get through. Hopefully we haven’t offended too many people, but hey that’s Hash.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
SOTB our GM had made it back from Pago just in time, and while somewhat frazzled called the hash circle to order. This was not going to be easy with sheer numbers that we had present, including screaming kids high off all the lollies that Tallyho had scattered about. First off SOTB thanked all the sponsors – Aqua Samoa, Westpac, Pure Blonde, Sinalei, Vailima, Y-Not for their generous support, especially for the cool new Hash shirts. He also thanked the Fire Department for bringing the truck.
The GM then called forth those new to Hash – there was Pati, Sam, a friend of Steve’s, a friend of Tiger Woody – too many, will need to look at the Hash Cash sheet to clear this up! The same thing with the Rethreads – I counted in Do Me Twice, Ali, Soprano, Seismic, Tooth Fairy, Swinger, but lost track after Auntie Bev. Could not hear what the excuses were – choice between light to write by, or screaming kids!
New Shoes were found on Karaoke, who under protest drank them clean with much aplomb.
This Day in History we had Michael being crowned Eastern Roman Emperor in 1041, and in 2006 Monica got her MA in psychology. There was also the 1941 declaration of war by Hungary on the US – that worked out real well for them! Closest living relative to Zsa Zsa was deemed to be Captain Mortein, surprise. But Lewinsky had his own retaliatory list of historic dates, and dobbed in Pirate Princess (for the Captain), Tallyho, Tiger Woody, Ninja, Poumuli, and I can’t recall who got the Oldsmobile going off the market to be non-discriminatory against old people – check the photos from Slippery!
Celebrity Awards went to Vai Vai (letter to the Editor) and Ring Ring (on TV). Some firemen who arrived late were given a taste of hash. The GM then sought to honour one of the Hash Teams that had participated in the Perimeter Relay, and those present were joined by closest living relatives to receive Das Boot! Cocktails on the Rocks team – Mike, Captain Mortein, Josh, Alan, Swinger, DMT and Horny Ho. It was a struggle to complete the task but they did it.
Turning to the GM’s Awards, he had noticed that there was a star missing from the Southern Cross in the new Hash Logo, so the Prime Minister Award went to Slim Shady. A Showing Off Award went to Vai Vai and Crime for running so fast at the end. The GM had also been watching TV in Pago, and had seen a dance crew from On The Rocks that were frankly poofters, and thus awarded Lewinsky the Gay Sponsor of the Year Award. Poumuli felt strongly that the GM should join in for watching a gay TV channel while overseas, but this was sadly reversed, and he was joined by loud chattering nabobs Rottweiler, Kiwi and Soprano.
On the run back the GM had noticed that Santa had joined in the running, and Tallyho defended this by saying he was bothered by all the chariot riding and the lack of suitably aged Hash Meres to sit on his lap. In another GM award, a Hasher had left the keg tap open – dumbass award to Mike. The GM then called on the Band of Angels team to try their luck at Das Boot, which they did in 45 seconds, much speedier than that other lot. Crime apparently had been doing his bit for internationalism – that is partying with the Christchurch Hash Meres, so they all got a special Hash gift thanks to Ring Ring, who joined them in the down-down. But before that the Christchurchers in turn had a gift for Crime, even though two of them had dropped out, and for some reason the girls got the glass prick.
Opening up for nominations, Poumuli nominated Tallyho for the Bad Santa Award for encouraging dysentery by dropping the lollies in puddles. Tallyho defended this practice vigorously, that he was only trying to toughen up their immune systems. After a vote, Tallyho succumbed.
Slim Shady nominated the GM for dedication to duty for coming back on time for the Hash, and for some reason Witch Doctor joined in. Princess of Darkness nominated Snake for hosting this 25th Anniversary of Hash in Samoa, and got the GM to join in for not mentioning this earlier. POD had also been updating the run lists, and had found that Captain Mortein had come to the most runs in 2011.
Tallyho nominated Seismic for not chiming in on the carol singing. Then for the Annual Awards, we had Celebrity of the Week of the Year Award was then given to Godfather, Sassy and Poumuli (need to check up on that one next year!). Front Running Hash Meres of the Year went to Ring Ring, Moa, Beck and Nicole. Front Running Hasher of the Year went to Cockblocker (through DMT), Captain Mortein, Vai Vai, with the add-ons of Lewinsky and SOTB for their Perimeter Relay performance. Most Down-Downs for the Year Award went to Captain Mortein, while Hashers with most Unexcused Absence Award went to Poumuli, Slippery and Titty Galore. The Best Run of the Year Award went to Snake. Hussy of the Year Award went to Horny Ho, and Prick of the Year went to CB, and this was taken by Sam.
At that point the Apia Hash Mad Monk appeared, and called forward Beck, who henceforth shall be known as Desperate Housewife. Mike was also made to kneel, and he shall henceforth be known as Sexpot.
Unfortunately Hideo and Yoko declined the honour of being named, probably something lost in translation.
Mismanagement was called forth and saluted, followed by the Hosts.
All in all this was a great celebration for Apia Hash – 25 years and 1600 runs. While having that amount of additional people and that many kegs was a recipe for disaster, we managed to pull it off and get through. Hopefully we haven’t offended too many people, but hey that’s Hash.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Hash Trash 1599B
The Hash was hosted out at Tafatafa Beach. Your Scribe had arrived at 6 AM that morning so was a bit worse for wear. Consequently the notes do not make any sense. The run apparently was quite a tough one according to Godfather and Tallyho, so big thanks to Crime. Your Scribe was asleep in the fale for all of that.
Tallyho stepped in as GM for the afternoon, and called forth those new to Hash – none. Then there were the rethreads, namely Poumuli. New shoes were found on Moa and one of the Christchurch visitors.
No celebrity awards were recorded, but on this day in history we had International Mountain Day, which went to Captain Mortein (Denmark is devoid of mountains), and in 1995 Monica was transferred out of the White House.
There then followed an incomprehensible gibberish in my notes, but Sassy nominated Vai Vai for something, as well as the Christchurch girls. Poumuli and Lewinsky were dobbed in twice, which kind of explains the unreadable pages. Tallyho was also rather upset with the lack of an appropriate run report, and the final entry says that Crime #$%$.
Sorry, should have asked for a replacement Scribe, but that is what you get for coming straight to Hash from the airport!
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Tallyho stepped in as GM for the afternoon, and called forth those new to Hash – none. Then there were the rethreads, namely Poumuli. New shoes were found on Moa and one of the Christchurch visitors.
No celebrity awards were recorded, but on this day in history we had International Mountain Day, which went to Captain Mortein (Denmark is devoid of mountains), and in 1995 Monica was transferred out of the White House.
There then followed an incomprehensible gibberish in my notes, but Sassy nominated Vai Vai for something, as well as the Christchurch girls. Poumuli and Lewinsky were dobbed in twice, which kind of explains the unreadable pages. Tallyho was also rather upset with the lack of an appropriate run report, and the final entry says that Crime #$%$.
Sorry, should have asked for a replacement Scribe, but that is what you get for coming straight to Hash from the airport!
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Friday, December 16, 2011
Hash Run 1602
Talofa All...
Yes, the next run will technically be the 1602nd run!
The run is being hosted by Swinger and BB in Siusega at Swinger's pad. The hosts have requested that this be a BYO BBQ, so please bring something to share. The theme for the run will be to wear something green or red.
There will be a keg on Monday too as well as softies and Godfathers "sweet nuts"...
Run starts 1730HRS and please bring your hash cash ($15 SAT)
See the map for directions
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Yes, the next run will technically be the 1602nd run!
The run is being hosted by Swinger and BB in Siusega at Swinger's pad. The hosts have requested that this be a BYO BBQ, so please bring something to share. The theme for the run will be to wear something green or red.
There will be a keg on Monday too as well as softies and Godfathers "sweet nuts"...
Run starts 1730HRS and please bring your hash cash ($15 SAT)
See the map for directions
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Hash Trash 1599
Dear all
a belated post from Spanky for the the run 1599.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Hosted by Mike and Becks at Yacht Club
Live hare – Godfather
GM was Tallyho, which is always an adventure!
New to Apia Hash was the Christchurch Hashers: Worker Shirker, Labrat, MILF and Flapper, Spanky’s friend Alice visiting for 2 weeks and Greeny’s friend Ella visiting for 1 night!
Retreads FBI and River were welcomed back.
Shoe Inspector found 2 new boots! Happy Feet and Ella – Lewinsky took Happy Feet’s out of his own shoes and Ella was a trooper and dranks hers out of her new shoes!
Celebrities included Mike for publishing helpful information on saving money – so you can buy more beer! And of course Sassy, who is in contention for most times mentioned in Samoan Observer. Ever.
GM Tallyho proceeded with This Day in History by assuming something must have happened in Denmark and with Monica. Also, it’s actually International Volunteer Day so Spanky represented the amazingly hard working volunteers in Samoa and Captain Mortein and Lewinsky represented Denmark and Monica, respectively.
No GM awards opened the floor right up to Sassy Girl, who welcomed the well dressed, matching CHCH Christchurch Hasher ladies! They all wore pink shirts that said they like to “shake it all night long” and matching skirts. Looking forward to 1600 because we’ve been told they have a new outfit for 1600 as well! They came all the way from Garden City to be here for the week of the 1600 and enjoy a short Samoa vacation as well. When they went for the downdown, they started singing B-I-M-B-O and the circle joined enthusiastically to welcome Labrat, WorkerShirker, MILF and Flapper!
Fast hands award to GM for spilling some beersky. Sassy nominated Mike for dropping a sausage on the ground but then putting it back on the grill. Right of Reply – 3 second rule. GM agrees and Sassy drinks. Remind me not to eat at GM nor Mike’s house any time soon!
FBI nominated Dev who has been around for a few years and came to Hash on his last night to say goodbye! He took his downdown right before heading to the airport. You will be missed, Devster!!
Mike noticed history repeating itself when more articles have been published about huge fish being caught – but none of our hash fisherpeople caught them! Shame. Hooker Lua and Lewinsky take the blame.
GM is in LOVE with the necklace mugs that Ringring made. He says they are great! Everyone should have one! They are great! Everyone should have 2! They are great! Tallyho and Ringring get a downdown to demonstrate and Ringring pours hers into Tallyho’s necklace mug putting it to good use!
They are nice cocout drinking vessels, by the way. 1600 comemorative coconut drinking vessels – it’s what all the cool kids are drinking from these days!
Tiger Woody arrived! Downdown. Snake adds that it should be a double because he thought the 1600 run was today. Silly Tiger.
Hooker Lua has it on good authority that Godfather forgot his girlfriend’s birthday, took her to someone else’s birthday party, gave her takeaway and said it was her present. Poor form! Godfather had no response.
Downdowns for the enthusiastic first time hosts Becks and Mike!
Malo lava and see you at the 1600 next week!
a belated post from Spanky for the the run 1599.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Hosted by Mike and Becks at Yacht Club
Live hare – Godfather
GM was Tallyho, which is always an adventure!
New to Apia Hash was the Christchurch Hashers: Worker Shirker, Labrat, MILF and Flapper, Spanky’s friend Alice visiting for 2 weeks and Greeny’s friend Ella visiting for 1 night!
Retreads FBI and River were welcomed back.
Shoe Inspector found 2 new boots! Happy Feet and Ella – Lewinsky took Happy Feet’s out of his own shoes and Ella was a trooper and dranks hers out of her new shoes!
Celebrities included Mike for publishing helpful information on saving money – so you can buy more beer! And of course Sassy, who is in contention for most times mentioned in Samoan Observer. Ever.
GM Tallyho proceeded with This Day in History by assuming something must have happened in Denmark and with Monica. Also, it’s actually International Volunteer Day so Spanky represented the amazingly hard working volunteers in Samoa and Captain Mortein and Lewinsky represented Denmark and Monica, respectively.
No GM awards opened the floor right up to Sassy Girl, who welcomed the well dressed, matching CHCH Christchurch Hasher ladies! They all wore pink shirts that said they like to “shake it all night long” and matching skirts. Looking forward to 1600 because we’ve been told they have a new outfit for 1600 as well! They came all the way from Garden City to be here for the week of the 1600 and enjoy a short Samoa vacation as well. When they went for the downdown, they started singing B-I-M-B-O and the circle joined enthusiastically to welcome Labrat, WorkerShirker, MILF and Flapper!
Fast hands award to GM for spilling some beersky. Sassy nominated Mike for dropping a sausage on the ground but then putting it back on the grill. Right of Reply – 3 second rule. GM agrees and Sassy drinks. Remind me not to eat at GM nor Mike’s house any time soon!
FBI nominated Dev who has been around for a few years and came to Hash on his last night to say goodbye! He took his downdown right before heading to the airport. You will be missed, Devster!!
Mike noticed history repeating itself when more articles have been published about huge fish being caught – but none of our hash fisherpeople caught them! Shame. Hooker Lua and Lewinsky take the blame.
GM is in LOVE with the necklace mugs that Ringring made. He says they are great! Everyone should have one! They are great! Everyone should have 2! They are great! Tallyho and Ringring get a downdown to demonstrate and Ringring pours hers into Tallyho’s necklace mug putting it to good use!
They are nice cocout drinking vessels, by the way. 1600 comemorative coconut drinking vessels – it’s what all the cool kids are drinking from these days!
Tiger Woody arrived! Downdown. Snake adds that it should be a double because he thought the 1600 run was today. Silly Tiger.
Hooker Lua has it on good authority that Godfather forgot his girlfriend’s birthday, took her to someone else’s birthday party, gave her takeaway and said it was her present. Poor form! Godfather had no response.
Downdowns for the enthusiastic first time hosts Becks and Mike!
Malo lava and see you at the 1600 next week!
Thursday, December 08, 2011
Hash Run 1599A - Tafatafa Beach - Sunday 11th Dec 2011
Good Evening All,
Sunday's hash run will be at Tafatafa Beach on the South Coast. The Run will start at 11am followed by a traditional Umu for lunch around 12:30pm. We have 4 Fales booked for Monday so don't worry about booking yourself a fale unless you plan to go early and spend the weekend there.
We will collect hash cash of $10 per person on the day and we will have some drinks down there at the beach on the day (Beers, Coconuts, Softies) but feel free to bring some more of your own if you plan on getting completely plastered.
It is advisable to car pool and then head down so as to limit the number of "drunk" hashers driving back to town after the run. For those who are driving down, there will be a $10-$15 charge for your vehicles.
If you have any more questions about the day, please call Lewinsky on 7528604, POD on 7528605 or Sassy on 7574250
On On
Sunday's hash run will be at Tafatafa Beach on the South Coast. The Run will start at 11am followed by a traditional Umu for lunch around 12:30pm. We have 4 Fales booked for Monday so don't worry about booking yourself a fale unless you plan to go early and spend the weekend there.
We will collect hash cash of $10 per person on the day and we will have some drinks down there at the beach on the day (Beers, Coconuts, Softies) but feel free to bring some more of your own if you plan on getting completely plastered.
It is advisable to car pool and then head down so as to limit the number of "drunk" hashers driving back to town after the run. For those who are driving down, there will be a $10-$15 charge for your vehicles.
If you have any more questions about the day, please call Lewinsky on 7528604, POD on 7528605 or Sassy on 7574250
On On
Monday, December 05, 2011
Hash Run 1599 - Mike and Becks- Apia Yacht Club, Mulinu'u
Morning All,
Tonight's run will be hosted by Mike and Becks from the Apia Yacht Club. There is no theme for today, but bring a change of clothes if you are keen for a swim after the run...I am sure you will want to jump into the ocean after tonight's run.
The hosts have kindly offered to provide the food for tonight and we will also have our Keg, Softies and sweet nuts.
Run starts at 1730Hrs...
See you all there
On On
Tonight's run will be hosted by Mike and Becks from the Apia Yacht Club. There is no theme for today, but bring a change of clothes if you are keen for a swim after the run...I am sure you will want to jump into the ocean after tonight's run.
The hosts have kindly offered to provide the food for tonight and we will also have our Keg, Softies and sweet nuts.
Run starts at 1730Hrs...
See you all there
On On
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Hash Trash 1598
Sabuwona from Durban, where your Scribe is hanging out. Hash Trash from Spanky below, which still needs more spell-checking.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Hosts: Top Shelf, Thong Hunter, Bungabunga with special thanks to the Y Not crew for providing the great venue
Theme: 16 Days of Activism to End Violence Against Women – The UN Women are in the middle of a 16 days of events to increase awareness and end violence against women. All the Hash runners were provided with t-shirts from UN.
What a great hash – there were two runs! The hosts set a run on paper but GM forgot and asked Dumass to set one on flour too! Flour was longer so the walkers took the paper and it was enjoyed by all.
The new runners this week were Bronwyn, Lucas, Pauline and Tim and Claire, who accidentally came because paddling was cancelled. Welcome!
Retreads were Bungabunga (too busy having bungabunga parties and getting kicked out of power), CB and DMT (they were both “working”), Bubsy (“studying” in NZ), and Lily and Rachel (been on Savaii).
New Boots: Eveready had new shoes! As he went to drink, Zsa Zsa said what were all thinking – “those are huge!”
Celebrity Awards: Marta was on TV, Niner is on the back page of the new Samoa Tourist Guidebook, Sassy was in the Observer – Again! – maybe will be renamed Sassy Observer. And finally for the best article ever – Double H was featured in an article called “Simply Creamy Goodness.”
GM Awards: TLC award to snake who took time off work to make the BBQ look like new. Piggy Back award to Mike who came back on the run to carry his wife across the water, “she’s always on my back!” Best P Party costume awards were for Porn Star CB and Pirate Chili. Dumass and Bubsy who took their dog on the run. Birthday downdown for Crash who is 31! Final GM award is for a bank man who travels a lot and came back to a bank function where his wife got crabs! (She was sitting at the party and a crab walked up between her legs!)
Nominations:
Lily the librarian found a nice kids book called pirate princess! It’s pages were stuck together but… our own Pirate Princess took her downdown.
Sassy Girl – who was dearly missed last week when there were so few nominations – was back in full force! First award was miscommunication award for the hosts – Lily and Rachel were the hosts and hares, but Dumass also set a run! Rachel dobbed in Spanky as the hareraiser. Spanky reminded GM that she told him the run was taken care of but GM was not in a good mood. Double for Spanky!
Tally Ho nominated the frontrunning bastards for not stopping at the Xs, but then it turns out Tally Ho was one of them! Backfired.
Sassy nominated Godfather for bringing friends but not preparing them – they had to run in sandals! Dumass added that CB also came without shoes! CB said it’s not his fault because his girl was supposed to pack them and forgot. I have yet to hear of anything ever that IS CB’s fault, but apparently DMY agreed to take the blame yet again on this one.
Random guy in black shirt was also dobbed in because we don’t know who he is but he didn’t come up for newbies and didn’t come for retreads. Who are you?
Tally Ho was upset that Vaivai made his nomination backfire, so he came up with another nomination. Something about frontrunning or something but hard to tell with the way Tally Ho talks.
Mr Whippy is on his way out again for an extended break away from Samoa after coming for only two weeks. He hosted a great Thanksgiving Hash last week and took his time with his downdown to give a farewell speech. He commented on how special Apia Hash is and that there is nowhere else like it in the world that he has seen. He remembered his first times at Apia Hash, when some of the older members took their time to welcome him and introduce him to the way it works, if anyone is interested you can read more about how Apia Hash works on the blog. Not one to let something nice be the last note, SOTB made Mr Whippy’s award a double for FBI.
Then the Monk Came! She heard about two girls who had been causing lots of trouble on Savaii for the last two years. She called up Lily and Rachel to assume the position. For Lily the librarian, who is very short but like to reach up high and read Samoan boys, will forever now be known as TOP SHELF. For Rachel, the Monk hears she goes running around her village wearing shortshorts and sometimes a thong – she says she runs for exercise but we hear she’s just running to check out prospective prey. She will forever now be known as THONG HUNTER. Downdown for the monk for making the trip!
Discrimination Award for the owner of a bar that offers happy hour specials on all drinks except Margaritas! How rude!
Maybe from Mr Whippy’s comments about introducing new members to Hash, Tally Ho recommends we do the hash anthem and a rousing version of it followed!
The Cake came out for Crash’s birthday – a delicious chocolate rum cake with a hula dancer. It was rectangular and CB was disappointed it wasn’t in the shape of goodies. Karaoke says Crash is a goodygoody so he doesn’t need a goody cake.
This week American Samoa not only scored their first soccer goal ever in a FIFA match, but they even won their first match ever against Toga! They were ranked dead last in the FIFA rankings but the coach hopes they will move up to be ranked in the top hundred. Wacko from AmSam took the downdown to represent. Wacko later shared with me that AmSam lost their game against the Cook Islands because one of their players scored a goal for the opposing team… good thing we didn’t know this at the time or it would have been a double!
Party foul - Niner scraped her knee on Friday night and continued to mope in the corner all night and refused to enjoy girls night! Boo. Titty G almost accidentally nominated herself for a blonde award but it ended up with Bubsy for taking the car keys but not the car.
Lastly, GM got nominated by Sassy Girl for withholding Greeny’s t-shirt money. Then GM got nominated by Sula via Sassy Girl for promising to sponsor her dance group but then not following through!
Big thank you to hosts and hares – all of them!
Announcements –
1600 Run Schedule:
Saturday Dec 10 – Nafanua Regatta. Hash will enter some teams in the social paddling race
Sunday Dec 11 – Beach run at Tafatafa
Monday Dec 12 – Christmas 1600 Run at SnakePit
On On
Spanky
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Hosts: Top Shelf, Thong Hunter, Bungabunga with special thanks to the Y Not crew for providing the great venue
Theme: 16 Days of Activism to End Violence Against Women – The UN Women are in the middle of a 16 days of events to increase awareness and end violence against women. All the Hash runners were provided with t-shirts from UN.
What a great hash – there were two runs! The hosts set a run on paper but GM forgot and asked Dumass to set one on flour too! Flour was longer so the walkers took the paper and it was enjoyed by all.
The new runners this week were Bronwyn, Lucas, Pauline and Tim and Claire, who accidentally came because paddling was cancelled. Welcome!
Retreads were Bungabunga (too busy having bungabunga parties and getting kicked out of power), CB and DMT (they were both “working”), Bubsy (“studying” in NZ), and Lily and Rachel (been on Savaii).
New Boots: Eveready had new shoes! As he went to drink, Zsa Zsa said what were all thinking – “those are huge!”
Celebrity Awards: Marta was on TV, Niner is on the back page of the new Samoa Tourist Guidebook, Sassy was in the Observer – Again! – maybe will be renamed Sassy Observer. And finally for the best article ever – Double H was featured in an article called “Simply Creamy Goodness.”
GM Awards: TLC award to snake who took time off work to make the BBQ look like new. Piggy Back award to Mike who came back on the run to carry his wife across the water, “she’s always on my back!” Best P Party costume awards were for Porn Star CB and Pirate Chili. Dumass and Bubsy who took their dog on the run. Birthday downdown for Crash who is 31! Final GM award is for a bank man who travels a lot and came back to a bank function where his wife got crabs! (She was sitting at the party and a crab walked up between her legs!)
Nominations:
Lily the librarian found a nice kids book called pirate princess! It’s pages were stuck together but… our own Pirate Princess took her downdown.
Sassy Girl – who was dearly missed last week when there were so few nominations – was back in full force! First award was miscommunication award for the hosts – Lily and Rachel were the hosts and hares, but Dumass also set a run! Rachel dobbed in Spanky as the hareraiser. Spanky reminded GM that she told him the run was taken care of but GM was not in a good mood. Double for Spanky!
Tally Ho nominated the frontrunning bastards for not stopping at the Xs, but then it turns out Tally Ho was one of them! Backfired.
Sassy nominated Godfather for bringing friends but not preparing them – they had to run in sandals! Dumass added that CB also came without shoes! CB said it’s not his fault because his girl was supposed to pack them and forgot. I have yet to hear of anything ever that IS CB’s fault, but apparently DMY agreed to take the blame yet again on this one.
Random guy in black shirt was also dobbed in because we don’t know who he is but he didn’t come up for newbies and didn’t come for retreads. Who are you?
Tally Ho was upset that Vaivai made his nomination backfire, so he came up with another nomination. Something about frontrunning or something but hard to tell with the way Tally Ho talks.
Mr Whippy is on his way out again for an extended break away from Samoa after coming for only two weeks. He hosted a great Thanksgiving Hash last week and took his time with his downdown to give a farewell speech. He commented on how special Apia Hash is and that there is nowhere else like it in the world that he has seen. He remembered his first times at Apia Hash, when some of the older members took their time to welcome him and introduce him to the way it works, if anyone is interested you can read more about how Apia Hash works on the blog. Not one to let something nice be the last note, SOTB made Mr Whippy’s award a double for FBI.
Then the Monk Came! She heard about two girls who had been causing lots of trouble on Savaii for the last two years. She called up Lily and Rachel to assume the position. For Lily the librarian, who is very short but like to reach up high and read Samoan boys, will forever now be known as TOP SHELF. For Rachel, the Monk hears she goes running around her village wearing shortshorts and sometimes a thong – she says she runs for exercise but we hear she’s just running to check out prospective prey. She will forever now be known as THONG HUNTER. Downdown for the monk for making the trip!
Discrimination Award for the owner of a bar that offers happy hour specials on all drinks except Margaritas! How rude!
Maybe from Mr Whippy’s comments about introducing new members to Hash, Tally Ho recommends we do the hash anthem and a rousing version of it followed!
The Cake came out for Crash’s birthday – a delicious chocolate rum cake with a hula dancer. It was rectangular and CB was disappointed it wasn’t in the shape of goodies. Karaoke says Crash is a goodygoody so he doesn’t need a goody cake.
This week American Samoa not only scored their first soccer goal ever in a FIFA match, but they even won their first match ever against Toga! They were ranked dead last in the FIFA rankings but the coach hopes they will move up to be ranked in the top hundred. Wacko from AmSam took the downdown to represent. Wacko later shared with me that AmSam lost their game against the Cook Islands because one of their players scored a goal for the opposing team… good thing we didn’t know this at the time or it would have been a double!
Party foul - Niner scraped her knee on Friday night and continued to mope in the corner all night and refused to enjoy girls night! Boo. Titty G almost accidentally nominated herself for a blonde award but it ended up with Bubsy for taking the car keys but not the car.
Lastly, GM got nominated by Sassy Girl for withholding Greeny’s t-shirt money. Then GM got nominated by Sula via Sassy Girl for promising to sponsor her dance group but then not following through!
Big thank you to hosts and hares – all of them!
Announcements –
1600 Run Schedule:
Saturday Dec 10 – Nafanua Regatta. Hash will enter some teams in the social paddling race
Sunday Dec 11 – Beach run at Tafatafa
Monday Dec 12 – Christmas 1600 Run at SnakePit
On On
Spanky
Monday, November 28, 2011
Hash Run 1598 - Y-Not Bar - Violence against women Run
Morning All,
Today's run will be at Y-not Bar in Matautu. The hosts (Bunga x2 and Spanky) are providing some meats for the BBQ, but if you could all bring something else along; salad, some other meat, etc for the bbq, that would be much appreciated.
All hasher's running today will get free t-shirts also, so please be on time if you want a shirt. Run will start at 1730HRS and there will be a keg there as well as softies and sweet nuts.
Please remember to bring your hash cash ($15) and your t-shirt money as today is the last day to collect the money for shirts. No map today, you should all know where this is.
Directions: Head down beach road to the Marina/Wharf, and look out for Y-not Bar and Paddles Restaurant. You cant miss it!
On On
Today's run will be at Y-not Bar in Matautu. The hosts (Bunga x2 and Spanky) are providing some meats for the BBQ, but if you could all bring something else along; salad, some other meat, etc for the bbq, that would be much appreciated.
All hasher's running today will get free t-shirts also, so please be on time if you want a shirt. Run will start at 1730HRS and there will be a keg there as well as softies and sweet nuts.
Please remember to bring your hash cash ($15) and your t-shirt money as today is the last day to collect the money for shirts. No map today, you should all know where this is.
Directions: Head down beach road to the Marina/Wharf, and look out for Y-not Bar and Paddles Restaurant. You cant miss it!
On On
Monday, November 21, 2011
Hash Run 1597- Thanksgiving Run @ Mr Whippy's - Lotopa
Morning All,
Tonight's run will be a BYO/Pot Luck run at Mr Whippy's in Lotopa to celebrate Thanksgiving. Please bring a dish or something to throw on the BBQ. This applies to "all" hasher's coming tonight. Lets all contribute to make this a fun evening. No food, no eat :)
There is no theme for tonight. There will be a Keg there as usual and softies.
Map is below for those who don't know where Mr Whippy lives. If you have not yet paid for your hash shirts, please bring your money with you tonight as we want to get them to the printer's this week (shirt is $25) and don't forget your hash cash ($15)
The Map is posted below but note that we will be in the first house, not the 2nd as stated on the map.
On On
Tonight's run will be a BYO/Pot Luck run at Mr Whippy's in Lotopa to celebrate Thanksgiving. Please bring a dish or something to throw on the BBQ. This applies to "all" hasher's coming tonight. Lets all contribute to make this a fun evening. No food, no eat :)
There is no theme for tonight. There will be a Keg there as usual and softies.
Map is below for those who don't know where Mr Whippy lives. If you have not yet paid for your hash shirts, please bring your money with you tonight as we want to get them to the printer's this week (shirt is $25) and don't forget your hash cash ($15)
The Map is posted below but note that we will be in the first house, not the 2nd as stated on the map.
On On
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Hash Trash 1596
Welcome to this episode of Living Planet where we will be visiting a long lost tribe of misfortunate runners wearing illusions of grandeur. The Apia Hash has been running for 30 years in a strange ritual of following bits of paper strewn by a carefully selected member of the tribe, known as the lepus samoaensis, or hare. The paper, made from carefully selected and processed cellulose, is shredded to a certain quality before being strewn. Oh, I am being told that there has been a processing fault in the tribe’s workshop so that for this run they will be using the bare woodchips. It’s a rare honour for us to witness this more primitive form of the ritual. And they are off, lets try and keep up with them, watch out for that branch, ouch. Oh dear, it seems like we have found a so-called false trail, and we are being showed aside by the massed tribe. A particularly massive individual greeted me just then with the famous one finger salute of the tribe. Now we are running through what appears to be someone’s garden, and you will notice the tribe daintily sidestepping the plants, except that one there that slipped. It’s a fascinating display, combined mystery with their guttural chant of “on gong” by the sounds of it. The trail appears to be culminating in a climax now and the speed appears to be picking up, evidently the scent of their reward – the golden nectar of Vailima – is so powerful that these lowly creatures have honed their senses to the maximum. And there we are – the tribe slowly reunites around the prized keg and await being called into a circle for the devotions.
Ah well. The GM, SOTB called the circle to order and asked if there were anyone new to Hash. There was Scott here on holiday who had just met a random guy in the pub and been brought to Hash by Rohan. Then there was Lewinsky’s cousin Alex from NZ, so the GM ordered a round for them both. The rethreads were Dizzy, Curly, Ramo, Buzzed, Hooker Lua and Olsen. Pitiful excuses so they all had to drink.
Celebrity Awards went to 9’er (famous father in the paper – taken by Kat), FBI (Rock the Boat ad – taken by Crash Bandicoot), Swinger (longwinded letter to the editor – taken by Snake) and Mike (full page ad with photo-shopped picture). For this day in history we celebrated the feast day of St Malo (token Samoan Eveready), the feast day of St Margaret (by spouse Snake), 1938 LSD was first produced in Switzerland (Ben), 2000 Bill Clinton is first US president to visit Vietnam after war but without Lewinsky (Lewinsky), and in honour of World Kindness Day the GM took the award for being the least kind in the hash.
Turning to his long list of dubious awards, the GM had been informed by the bouncers at Ynot that two ladies, one a hasher, had been departing the club late one evening, still dressed to the nines, and had been accosted by calls for “hey baby wanna have a good time” from from young men across the street. While the hash mere was seriously considering the offers on hand, however, her friend shooed them away with a tirade of Samoan swearing. A Cradlesnatching Blocked Award to Hooker Lua.
At the start of the run one new hash mere had shown up without shoes and had borrowed some from the host. These were clearly brand spanking new, so Alex and Ring Ring had to drink from them, with Ring Ring doing a double for forgetting her hat was on. Then there was the utterly spurious allegation that Poumuli had been strip searched by the customs officials for bringing in the 217 t-shirts. This is untrue, as they were told that your Scribe is a heavy sweater and these were all for personal use.
We had all read in the papers that two new police stations were being established around the country, and what for? Surely to stop Crime and Crash! Get In Gaol Awards for the two of them. Then there was the article about the really huge marlin, but which had none of the accomplished hash fishers involved. Hooker Lua and Lewinsky got the Bad Luck Award.
Godfather was sadly absent this week, and his scrumptious sweet nuts were sorely missed, but none so more than the absence of the ukulele. At least that partially drowns out the caterwauling of Strangler, but this week he was standing next to the equally sonically impaired Dizzy. The combined effect of their efforts drove Mini-Ninja to dash for the street and scared the wits out of the already muted hound chained at the back. Roll Over Beethoven Awards to the lot.
Opening up for nominations, Sassygirl BJ was quick off the mark and nominated Crash for impinging on her maestro duties by starting the song too early. Poumuli nominated Mike for not being able to read biblical jargon, but then again he is Australian so this one should have been commuted. And a latecummer award to Hot Rod.
Screamer nominated Poumuli for leaving the Hash for several weeks, but she got added in for being jealous at being left out of the delegation. Several hand gestures were exchanged. Poumuli then nominated Eveready for being surprised that the Scribe knew bible jargon, but this ended up on the GM instead.
Sassy had observed one hasher arriving with some guests and then being late had run off while leaving them to wander in the bush. Unhashmanlike Behaviour Award to Zsa Zsa, who also saw the re-introduction of the ice seat for being the last to pay hash cash and for taking his money out of what appeared to be his bum crack. His friends were introduced, Ivana from Czech Republic and Antonio from Spain, who helpfully reinserted some of the ice that had fallen from Zsa Zsa’s seat.
The GM had found his wits again, apparently they had been lying in the melting pool of Zsa Zsa’s crack, and nominated Lewinsky for non-compliance with the new liquor laws. Kat nominated Sassy as no one else had – fair enough. Rohan got caught leaning and this was doubled as Sassy put her hat on his head.
Then the GM really outshone himself in terms of his STASI-like network of spies. Apparently the offspring of one hasher had groped a certain hash mere, without the husband reacting. Come on, it was a three-year old child. Anyway, Poumuli got the Ignorant Spouse Award while Ben scored another Father of the Year Award.
Spanky had been fascinated by Ida’s toe socks and slippers, and called for an award. However, this was deemed to be culturally insensitive, so she had to join in, and her protests garnered her the Dome of Silence.
Ninja, in proud possession of the Angry Chicken Hat, was finally able to bestow this upon Zsa Zsa, at the request of a fellow Hungarian. Zsa Zsa then accused the GM for playing with a dildo app on his phone during a hash mini circle in Suva, but the vote saw both of them take it. Nicole got a leaner award, while Poumuli snuck in a last award for Ted for rigging up a sail boat and it setting off – without him!
The Hare and Hosts, Buzzer and Ring Ring were saluted for a marvellous tough run through the bushes, before we ascended on the bulging table.
Finally, a t-shirt fit for Sassy!
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Ah well. The GM, SOTB called the circle to order and asked if there were anyone new to Hash. There was Scott here on holiday who had just met a random guy in the pub and been brought to Hash by Rohan. Then there was Lewinsky’s cousin Alex from NZ, so the GM ordered a round for them both. The rethreads were Dizzy, Curly, Ramo, Buzzed, Hooker Lua and Olsen. Pitiful excuses so they all had to drink.
Celebrity Awards went to 9’er (famous father in the paper – taken by Kat), FBI (Rock the Boat ad – taken by Crash Bandicoot), Swinger (longwinded letter to the editor – taken by Snake) and Mike (full page ad with photo-shopped picture). For this day in history we celebrated the feast day of St Malo (token Samoan Eveready), the feast day of St Margaret (by spouse Snake), 1938 LSD was first produced in Switzerland (Ben), 2000 Bill Clinton is first US president to visit Vietnam after war but without Lewinsky (Lewinsky), and in honour of World Kindness Day the GM took the award for being the least kind in the hash.
Turning to his long list of dubious awards, the GM had been informed by the bouncers at Ynot that two ladies, one a hasher, had been departing the club late one evening, still dressed to the nines, and had been accosted by calls for “hey baby wanna have a good time” from from young men across the street. While the hash mere was seriously considering the offers on hand, however, her friend shooed them away with a tirade of Samoan swearing. A Cradlesnatching Blocked Award to Hooker Lua.
At the start of the run one new hash mere had shown up without shoes and had borrowed some from the host. These were clearly brand spanking new, so Alex and Ring Ring had to drink from them, with Ring Ring doing a double for forgetting her hat was on. Then there was the utterly spurious allegation that Poumuli had been strip searched by the customs officials for bringing in the 217 t-shirts. This is untrue, as they were told that your Scribe is a heavy sweater and these were all for personal use.
We had all read in the papers that two new police stations were being established around the country, and what for? Surely to stop Crime and Crash! Get In Gaol Awards for the two of them. Then there was the article about the really huge marlin, but which had none of the accomplished hash fishers involved. Hooker Lua and Lewinsky got the Bad Luck Award.
Godfather was sadly absent this week, and his scrumptious sweet nuts were sorely missed, but none so more than the absence of the ukulele. At least that partially drowns out the caterwauling of Strangler, but this week he was standing next to the equally sonically impaired Dizzy. The combined effect of their efforts drove Mini-Ninja to dash for the street and scared the wits out of the already muted hound chained at the back. Roll Over Beethoven Awards to the lot.
Opening up for nominations, Sassygirl BJ was quick off the mark and nominated Crash for impinging on her maestro duties by starting the song too early. Poumuli nominated Mike for not being able to read biblical jargon, but then again he is Australian so this one should have been commuted. And a latecummer award to Hot Rod.
Screamer nominated Poumuli for leaving the Hash for several weeks, but she got added in for being jealous at being left out of the delegation. Several hand gestures were exchanged. Poumuli then nominated Eveready for being surprised that the Scribe knew bible jargon, but this ended up on the GM instead.
Sassy had observed one hasher arriving with some guests and then being late had run off while leaving them to wander in the bush. Unhashmanlike Behaviour Award to Zsa Zsa, who also saw the re-introduction of the ice seat for being the last to pay hash cash and for taking his money out of what appeared to be his bum crack. His friends were introduced, Ivana from Czech Republic and Antonio from Spain, who helpfully reinserted some of the ice that had fallen from Zsa Zsa’s seat.
The GM had found his wits again, apparently they had been lying in the melting pool of Zsa Zsa’s crack, and nominated Lewinsky for non-compliance with the new liquor laws. Kat nominated Sassy as no one else had – fair enough. Rohan got caught leaning and this was doubled as Sassy put her hat on his head.
Then the GM really outshone himself in terms of his STASI-like network of spies. Apparently the offspring of one hasher had groped a certain hash mere, without the husband reacting. Come on, it was a three-year old child. Anyway, Poumuli got the Ignorant Spouse Award while Ben scored another Father of the Year Award.
Spanky had been fascinated by Ida’s toe socks and slippers, and called for an award. However, this was deemed to be culturally insensitive, so she had to join in, and her protests garnered her the Dome of Silence.
Ninja, in proud possession of the Angry Chicken Hat, was finally able to bestow this upon Zsa Zsa, at the request of a fellow Hungarian. Zsa Zsa then accused the GM for playing with a dildo app on his phone during a hash mini circle in Suva, but the vote saw both of them take it. Nicole got a leaner award, while Poumuli snuck in a last award for Ted for rigging up a sail boat and it setting off – without him!
The Hare and Hosts, Buzzer and Ring Ring were saluted for a marvellous tough run through the bushes, before we ascended on the bulging table.
Finally, a t-shirt fit for Sassy!
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Monday, November 14, 2011
Hash Run 1596 - Ring Ring @ Alafua
Morning All,
Tonights run will be a BYO Meats for the BBQ run at Ring Ring's place in Alafua. Ring Ring is providing all the salads/Breads, etc and hasher's are to bring something to throw on the BBQ.
There is no theme so come with your normal hash gear. Run will start at 1730HRS with a Keg and softies.
For your hash t-Shirts, you need to bring your $25 (per shirt) today including your hash cash....No money, No shirt... :) so please pay up today as we need to recover funds.
Map is below.
On On
Tonights run will be a BYO Meats for the BBQ run at Ring Ring's place in Alafua. Ring Ring is providing all the salads/Breads, etc and hasher's are to bring something to throw on the BBQ.
There is no theme so come with your normal hash gear. Run will start at 1730HRS with a Keg and softies.
For your hash t-Shirts, you need to bring your $25 (per shirt) today including your hash cash....No money, No shirt... :) so please pay up today as we need to recover funds.
Map is below.
On On
Friday, November 11, 2011
Hash Trash 1595
Yea, verily much has been written in the annals of Hash History, yet seldom has the vagaries of the GM, high priest of the flock, been as convoluted as this week. As the Hashers gathered in groups of twos and threes, in the Pit that is called Snake’s, in the Vale of Saleufi, or Place of the Giant Dogs, confusion reigned as the dutiful found no respite from the silent GM. Though upon the entrance of the man called Swinger, son of the renowned healers of Siusega, the GM called forth that the run required a virgin hare to be sacrificed, and that the run would have a living hare leading the followers. Amongst the gathered there was much muttering, as the man called Swinger was deemed as far removed from virginhood as the Lake of Lanoto is from the Ridge of Tuasivi. Reflecting upon the implications of this sacrifice, there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth, as none would wish to see the hare in its natural and unwholesome state, that is de-bagged and bare-arsed. The hashers went on bended knee afore the GM, and in high voices lamented their fate, and begged, even unto the lives of all their loved ones, to be spared this ultimate agony. Having conspired as to how he might smite them later, the GM spake thus “go, run into the land of Apia, through the alleyways and the middens, and pursue thoust the hare, who is live, but thou shallt not remove from the hare the garments that are called under.” And they did as they were bidden, and the man Swinger girded up his loins and set forth through the Gates of Venom and Snakebite, and it came to pass as it had been foretold by the GM. For this was a long pursuit, through the alleys of Saleufi, into the shadow of Togafuafua, until the hare that is live found a midden strewn path through the dwellings of the Aai o Niue, that lies by the banks of the river that is called Vaisigano, or bringer-of-sewer-to-the-ocean. The hashers returned to that Pit that is called Snake’s, conspiring and eagerly seeking out the child of Sassy, so they might slay him, verily into a stupor, with the mighty cups that are called Down and Down.
OK, enough blasphemy from your Scribe. The GM – SOTB of the Sass, called the Hash Circle to order an asked who might be new to Apia Hash. There was Ted from Oz, who could not name one Hasher that had brought him, so he was given a large one and certainly drank it like an Oz. The rethreads were Skunk, Horny Ho, Nicole and Crash Bandicoot.
Celebrity Awards went to Mike (wife in paper), Godfather (taken by Swinger), 9’er (kangaroo attacks in Oz), Strangler (was in paper, Rohan was a look alike) and Ali (for the Ali bin Shagger Laundromat photo).
This day in history went to Kat (1999 Oz votes to keep Queen as Head of State – Need Nanny Award), Sassy and Crime (1918 Spanish Flu kills 20% of Samoa) and SOTB (for being in a historic dive record book). Latecummers Pro Bona, Dumass and Sula were given their just rewards.
Opening up for nominations, Ali congratulated someone called J for the care and concern shown during the hosting of the paddling regatta, so Ali was joined by SOTB, Anita, Horny Ho, 9’er, Mike and Crime as well as the lauded Dumass. Sassygirl BJ nominated Ben for the Good Father Award for running with Lucas on his shoulders (he’s done that before, so we may need to find a better term).
Kat fabricated a story about how a certain hasher had been so keen on a soccer game that he had turned up a day early, so Confused By Time Zones Award to Poumuli. Our Japanese couple Ida and Kyoko had been picking some nice flowers and made a bouquet, so Sassy nominated them for the Newlyweds But Lost in Translation Award.
The GM noted that yet again we were sans the normal hash mugs, to which Crash tried to pass the buck to Sassy. This did not work for obvious reasons, so Crash took the Down Down. Sassy was on a roll as usual and thanked Snake for his impromptu hosting, while Poumuli got a false accusation award for intimating that Snake had something to do with the low beer levels in the keg. Nevertheless, the GM found someone that actually works for Vailima to take a Punishment Award – Delicious handed this over to Crash.
Sassy had noticed that while Snake is an electrician, he needed someone to set off to get him Cash Power to enable the opening of the gates. Trying to silence his mother, the GM recalled how a hasher had complained of a backache, and been assured that this could be fixed by Ali, had gone upstairs at Ynot for a LONG time, and looking blank and bewildered upon his return. Dodgy Digging Award to Ali and Dumass.
Your Scribe was not on his best behaviour so he tried to assist the shutting up of Sassy with an award for hiding the money for the 1600th shirts. This backfired tremendously. Swinger added that Crime was not living up to his name, so he joined in. A Leaning Award went to Ben, who wasn’t even paying attention as he was playing on his phone with Lucas, so this became a large one. Since there was a poumuli coming out of the fence, Dumass tried to make this lean, but it didn’t work.
Poumuli tried to get a Density Award for Witch Doctor for not finding Nemo, but she countered with a Needing to be Dragged by Dive Instructor Award. A cellphonus interruptus award went to Nicole, while Poumuli accused Mike of negligence for not debagging Swinger when he had the chance. Ali thought that your Scribe had messed up, so joined the trio.
Finally, Sassy nominated Skunk for the Flagrant Enthusiasm Award for getting all excited about setting the run, then skiving off. The hosts and the hare, Snake, Skunk, Horny Ho (for getting the pizzas) and Swinger were saluted.
Check the blog for details of next week’s run, but it will be hosted by Ring Ring in Alafua, and will be a BYO meat for the BBQ.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
OK, enough blasphemy from your Scribe. The GM – SOTB of the Sass, called the Hash Circle to order an asked who might be new to Apia Hash. There was Ted from Oz, who could not name one Hasher that had brought him, so he was given a large one and certainly drank it like an Oz. The rethreads were Skunk, Horny Ho, Nicole and Crash Bandicoot.
Celebrity Awards went to Mike (wife in paper), Godfather (taken by Swinger), 9’er (kangaroo attacks in Oz), Strangler (was in paper, Rohan was a look alike) and Ali (for the Ali bin Shagger Laundromat photo).
This day in history went to Kat (1999 Oz votes to keep Queen as Head of State – Need Nanny Award), Sassy and Crime (1918 Spanish Flu kills 20% of Samoa) and SOTB (for being in a historic dive record book). Latecummers Pro Bona, Dumass and Sula were given their just rewards.
Opening up for nominations, Ali congratulated someone called J for the care and concern shown during the hosting of the paddling regatta, so Ali was joined by SOTB, Anita, Horny Ho, 9’er, Mike and Crime as well as the lauded Dumass. Sassygirl BJ nominated Ben for the Good Father Award for running with Lucas on his shoulders (he’s done that before, so we may need to find a better term).
Kat fabricated a story about how a certain hasher had been so keen on a soccer game that he had turned up a day early, so Confused By Time Zones Award to Poumuli. Our Japanese couple Ida and Kyoko had been picking some nice flowers and made a bouquet, so Sassy nominated them for the Newlyweds But Lost in Translation Award.
The GM noted that yet again we were sans the normal hash mugs, to which Crash tried to pass the buck to Sassy. This did not work for obvious reasons, so Crash took the Down Down. Sassy was on a roll as usual and thanked Snake for his impromptu hosting, while Poumuli got a false accusation award for intimating that Snake had something to do with the low beer levels in the keg. Nevertheless, the GM found someone that actually works for Vailima to take a Punishment Award – Delicious handed this over to Crash.
Sassy had noticed that while Snake is an electrician, he needed someone to set off to get him Cash Power to enable the opening of the gates. Trying to silence his mother, the GM recalled how a hasher had complained of a backache, and been assured that this could be fixed by Ali, had gone upstairs at Ynot for a LONG time, and looking blank and bewildered upon his return. Dodgy Digging Award to Ali and Dumass.
Your Scribe was not on his best behaviour so he tried to assist the shutting up of Sassy with an award for hiding the money for the 1600th shirts. This backfired tremendously. Swinger added that Crime was not living up to his name, so he joined in. A Leaning Award went to Ben, who wasn’t even paying attention as he was playing on his phone with Lucas, so this became a large one. Since there was a poumuli coming out of the fence, Dumass tried to make this lean, but it didn’t work.
Poumuli tried to get a Density Award for Witch Doctor for not finding Nemo, but she countered with a Needing to be Dragged by Dive Instructor Award. A cellphonus interruptus award went to Nicole, while Poumuli accused Mike of negligence for not debagging Swinger when he had the chance. Ali thought that your Scribe had messed up, so joined the trio.
Finally, Sassy nominated Skunk for the Flagrant Enthusiasm Award for getting all excited about setting the run, then skiving off. The hosts and the hare, Snake, Skunk, Horny Ho (for getting the pizzas) and Swinger were saluted.
Check the blog for details of next week’s run, but it will be hosted by Ring Ring in Alafua, and will be a BYO meat for the BBQ.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Monday, November 07, 2011
Hash Run 1595 - SNAKE PIT
Hash tonight will be at the Snake pit in town.
Its a "chip in for pizza's" run and there will also be a keg on tonight.
Run starts 1730Hrs...sorry for the late change in Venue.
On On
Its a "chip in for pizza's" run and there will also be a keg on tonight.
Run starts 1730Hrs...sorry for the late change in Venue.
On On
Thursday, November 03, 2011
Hash Trash 1594
The Hash was hosted at Screamer’s house in Siusega by Spanky, Hornithologist, Colm and Beccy. The hare was Hornithologist who had set the run on flour, which had us worried given the recent rains and the predilection of the local dogs to eat such flour. Oh well, we bravely set out right out the gate – no no no, she meant left – women! On to the Tafagata road for a while, right into the back of Aleisa, when eventually we found a totally confusing false trail along the fence of the Orator Hotel. We realised we could have pushed through, but someone found a new trail on the tracks behind the hotel, and then it was largely on home down past the HUGE church at the corner in Siusega and into the yard for the tumescent sweet nuts of Godfather. All in all a good run, exhausting false trails, unsafe hash marking – we need to be running AGAINST the traffic, and it didn’t rain.
SOTB was to sweaty to wear his Cartman Mask for the circle, so it was an undisguised GM who called things to order. The newbies to Hash were Beccy from Canada, brought by Hornithologist. The rethreads were Tramp, Einstein, Tooth Fairy, Karaoke, Eveready and Slippery. Explanations were too long and your Scribe was swatting at the on-off light to see his writing.
Celebrity Awards went to FBI (Observer photo, Captain Mortein was deemed closest living relative), Ninja (also in the paper, taken by Yuki), and POD (looking like a lady at the ball, so SOTB had to take it with no Lewinsky in sight). This Day in History Awards went to Sondra and Spanky (JFK announced idea of Peace Corps, 1960), Einstein (Prussia stole Schelswig-Holstein from Denmark, 1864) and Captain Mortein (Congress of Vienna made Denmark give Norway to Sweden, 1814). A special Day of Remembrance for Victims of Political Repression went to the GM for all the pain he puts the entire Hash through.
The GM had some special awards to hand out namely a Shortcutting Bastard Award to Swinger for pushing through along the Orator fence. Then there was the unlikely story of a Hasher being caught red-handed ogling a voluptuous girl on the way to Hash, so a Perved But Got Busted Award went to Godfather. Hashmanlike Behaviour I say!
Then there was the Hash Mere who had acted without really thinking, stomping a coconut shell to get it open wearing jandals. Well the coconut bit back. A Stupidity Award to Witch Doctor, and an accompanying one for Poumuli for showing her the trick in the first place. Eveready and Karaoke had been to Las Vegas, and had brought back a Vegas mug, sold by Spanky’s twin, and she was joined by Sassygirl BJ for not bringing the Hash Mugs.
Last week we had the fake quack award for Ali, and this time he came in scrubs, so the Thieving Hospital Property Award went to Ali. Then there was the Bad Parenting Award to Ben for teaching Lucas to swim by means of throwing him into the pool. Poor boy was traumatized and spent the rest of the evening playing under the tarp with the little girls. Oh, more Hashmanlike Behaviour!
Opening up for nominations, Poumuli had received one of those scam emails offering heaps of money, and the identity was given away as the man, one Abdul Wahid, signed that he was Eveready! Nigerian Email Scam Award to Eveready. Sassy nominated Captain Mortein for the Sweeping Untrue Statement Award, claiming that he cooks every day, and noting the fact that Snake had to fix the BBQ.
Sassy also nominated Wahoo and Pirate Princess for chatting up the pool guard – Flagrant Hussy Vixens Award! The GM did a contest for the best dressed hasher at the circle, and nominated 60 and 9’er, Tooth Fairy, Colm and Hornithologist. Tooth Fairy got this one by far for impersonating an insane dentist. Wait a minute…
Ali wanted to nominate Ida and Shideo for not meeting him to go up Mt Vaea, but he couldn’t remember their names, called them Inky and Binky, and the GM decreed that Ali join for probably scaring them out of their wits. Yeah, a fake doctor, what pleasant company for a tramp in the dark forest! Poumuli nominated Screamer for going in the pool rather than running.
The Hosts and the Hare were saluted as the food was finally ready.
Check the blog for next week’s run. There will be a sign up sheet for Hash 1600 Run, available in small, medium, large and XL, in cotton or microfiber, colours white, blue, green or red, so come prepared. They will be approximately 25 tala each.
Finally a photo of what Captain Mortein could look like if he pisses off Pirate Princess ever.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
SOTB was to sweaty to wear his Cartman Mask for the circle, so it was an undisguised GM who called things to order. The newbies to Hash were Beccy from Canada, brought by Hornithologist. The rethreads were Tramp, Einstein, Tooth Fairy, Karaoke, Eveready and Slippery. Explanations were too long and your Scribe was swatting at the on-off light to see his writing.
Celebrity Awards went to FBI (Observer photo, Captain Mortein was deemed closest living relative), Ninja (also in the paper, taken by Yuki), and POD (looking like a lady at the ball, so SOTB had to take it with no Lewinsky in sight). This Day in History Awards went to Sondra and Spanky (JFK announced idea of Peace Corps, 1960), Einstein (Prussia stole Schelswig-Holstein from Denmark, 1864) and Captain Mortein (Congress of Vienna made Denmark give Norway to Sweden, 1814). A special Day of Remembrance for Victims of Political Repression went to the GM for all the pain he puts the entire Hash through.
The GM had some special awards to hand out namely a Shortcutting Bastard Award to Swinger for pushing through along the Orator fence. Then there was the unlikely story of a Hasher being caught red-handed ogling a voluptuous girl on the way to Hash, so a Perved But Got Busted Award went to Godfather. Hashmanlike Behaviour I say!
Then there was the Hash Mere who had acted without really thinking, stomping a coconut shell to get it open wearing jandals. Well the coconut bit back. A Stupidity Award to Witch Doctor, and an accompanying one for Poumuli for showing her the trick in the first place. Eveready and Karaoke had been to Las Vegas, and had brought back a Vegas mug, sold by Spanky’s twin, and she was joined by Sassygirl BJ for not bringing the Hash Mugs.
Last week we had the fake quack award for Ali, and this time he came in scrubs, so the Thieving Hospital Property Award went to Ali. Then there was the Bad Parenting Award to Ben for teaching Lucas to swim by means of throwing him into the pool. Poor boy was traumatized and spent the rest of the evening playing under the tarp with the little girls. Oh, more Hashmanlike Behaviour!
Opening up for nominations, Poumuli had received one of those scam emails offering heaps of money, and the identity was given away as the man, one Abdul Wahid, signed that he was Eveready! Nigerian Email Scam Award to Eveready. Sassy nominated Captain Mortein for the Sweeping Untrue Statement Award, claiming that he cooks every day, and noting the fact that Snake had to fix the BBQ.
Sassy also nominated Wahoo and Pirate Princess for chatting up the pool guard – Flagrant Hussy Vixens Award! The GM did a contest for the best dressed hasher at the circle, and nominated 60 and 9’er, Tooth Fairy, Colm and Hornithologist. Tooth Fairy got this one by far for impersonating an insane dentist. Wait a minute…
Ali wanted to nominate Ida and Shideo for not meeting him to go up Mt Vaea, but he couldn’t remember their names, called them Inky and Binky, and the GM decreed that Ali join for probably scaring them out of their wits. Yeah, a fake doctor, what pleasant company for a tramp in the dark forest! Poumuli nominated Screamer for going in the pool rather than running.
The Hosts and the Hare were saluted as the food was finally ready.
Check the blog for next week’s run. There will be a sign up sheet for Hash 1600 Run, available in small, medium, large and XL, in cotton or microfiber, colours white, blue, green or red, so come prepared. They will be approximately 25 tala each.
Finally a photo of what Captain Mortein could look like if he pisses off Pirate Princess ever.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)