Dear all hashers
Slight change of plan as the mud is a bit too much at the top. We will now host the Hash at the Paul compound, entrance is opposite Bernard Street on the Cross Island Road. Pass Bernard Street then take the first left off Cross Island Road, down a track. There is an old sign there saying Manumea t-shirt printing. Follow the track past one house, then veer up to the right at the fork. We'll put out some hash marks to guide you.
Keg will be there and some bbq as promised.
Apologies again for late posting, and hope to see you all there.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Monday, January 31, 2011
Friday, January 28, 2011
Hash Trash 1552
The Hash had to relocate from Malololelei due to the weather, as it was raining sideways and there was no way that the trail could be secured. Lewinsky stepped up again and offered On The Rocks as an alternative. The aftermath of Cyclone Wilma was very much in effect, and it was decided to do a live hare with Cockblocker, but to also try and keep the pack together for safety given the waves. The run progressed along the seawall, past the RSA and the fish market and out to Sogi where we turned back, several pounds heavier due to the incessant rain. Back at HQ1, Godfather had provided his sweet nuts and a grand selection of roast pork and umu for our pupus. Bless him for his generosity, this provided good sustenance to those of us who braved the weather and ran.
Princess of Darkness was present as GM, and called the circle to order. There was only one new to Apia Hash – John from Hawaii who was visiting Swinger. The rethreads were Crown of Thorns (overseas based now), Vulture (back for a few weeks, came prepared with a snorkel), Dawn Raid (hiding), and Do Me Twice (back from Christmas break). Swinger protested that there were more rethreads, and closely avoided a Not Listening To The GM Award. The GM noted that because of the sewage in the rainwater we should probably dispense with that item for now. Getting to her list of awards, a Parking Misdemeanour Award was given to Titty Galore, CB and Pro Bona for some terrible reverse parking and exclaiming “if you sit on my thing you won’t see the angle”. Wane joined them for driving into something. DMT was given the Stripper Award for wearing a very white t-shirt in the rain.
Further news had reached the GM of an unannounced bbq on Saturday, but sans bbq, so the guests had to entertain and feed the other guests. COT and CB had to cook, so Zsa Zsa and Chilindrina took the Poor Hosts Award. Poumuli tried and failed to get CB to join, as he had happened on the event and was ordered to change his shirt by Wahoo due to the stink of CB’s cooking. At this point there was too much chattering, so the GM called a vote for awarding the Dome of Silence to Vulture or Ophelie, which ended up being decided in chug. Vulture won, thus giving Ophelie the Dome of Silence for the rest of the circle, but was given an UnHashmanlike Behaviour Award for ungallantly racing the lady Ophelie. (this one is ethically challenging)
Celebrity Awards went to Snatch (Mum in the paper) and a double to Poumuli (TV3 and Observer). The GM then turned her attention to our new Super-Heroes, the two rescuers in the new VERTS, who both turned up wearing their silly yellow jackets. She made them look more like superheroes by having them wear underwear (ladies’) on the outside of their shorts and gave both SOTB and CB a down down. Opening up for nominations from the floor, SOTB said he had witnessed a near death experience, with a man nearly killed by the falling down of the HQ1 sign. Lewinsky began to quibble about witnesses, and since one could be produced, it became a double Lethal Weapon (Unloaded) Award. We then welcomed latecummer Kiss My Butt.
Dawn Raid sought to get Poumuli an award for losing his new hubcaps, but since Dawn Raid had been outside HQ1 during the theft and not seen it, the GM agreed to reverse the award. A leavers award was suggested by Godfather for Claire and Eileen. Before that, Eileen ventured deep into FBI territory with an award for Brazilian and Godfather. Apparently they both believe that Louis Armstrong sang “and dogs say goodnight” in “What a wonderful world”. In the end all four took the award. Zsa Zsa recounted how it was so wet during the run, and that Swinger had disappeared from the run with two ladies, in order to take, erm, pictures. Wannabe Pornographer Award to Swinger. This prompted SOTB to nominate Poumuli for a Wannabe Award (All Blacks) for wearing a NZ rugby-shirt (its almost an antique, and SOTB wears a Ireland shirt at times – deeply unfair). SOTB also insisted that DMT do the New Shoes Award, as she hadn’t run.
Ophelie piped up that she had an award for KMB, but was stopped short as she was supposed to be wearing the Dome of Silence. She was joined in the award by Carin, because Poumuli suddenly remembered that January 24th 41 AD was when the Romans killed Caligula, and called for a Caligula Removal Appreciation Award. Snatch, in a pique of annoyance, got an award for Vulture for asking if Greenie was her Father. COT had a story of getting drinks in a “fine” establishment, and a certain Hasher bought an ula for his wife and “leid” her from behind. While COT by rights should have joined Lewinsky for calling HQ1 “fine”, the gentleman took it well.
The GM closed the circle with a Culinary Appreciation Award to Godfather, and the traditional salute to the host and hare, Lewinsky and CB.
Next week’s hash, weather permitting, will be at Malololelei, and the week after at Taumeasina. Watch the blog for late changes in case the weather turns crappy.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Princess of Darkness was present as GM, and called the circle to order. There was only one new to Apia Hash – John from Hawaii who was visiting Swinger. The rethreads were Crown of Thorns (overseas based now), Vulture (back for a few weeks, came prepared with a snorkel), Dawn Raid (hiding), and Do Me Twice (back from Christmas break). Swinger protested that there were more rethreads, and closely avoided a Not Listening To The GM Award. The GM noted that because of the sewage in the rainwater we should probably dispense with that item for now. Getting to her list of awards, a Parking Misdemeanour Award was given to Titty Galore, CB and Pro Bona for some terrible reverse parking and exclaiming “if you sit on my thing you won’t see the angle”. Wane joined them for driving into something. DMT was given the Stripper Award for wearing a very white t-shirt in the rain.
Further news had reached the GM of an unannounced bbq on Saturday, but sans bbq, so the guests had to entertain and feed the other guests. COT and CB had to cook, so Zsa Zsa and Chilindrina took the Poor Hosts Award. Poumuli tried and failed to get CB to join, as he had happened on the event and was ordered to change his shirt by Wahoo due to the stink of CB’s cooking. At this point there was too much chattering, so the GM called a vote for awarding the Dome of Silence to Vulture or Ophelie, which ended up being decided in chug. Vulture won, thus giving Ophelie the Dome of Silence for the rest of the circle, but was given an UnHashmanlike Behaviour Award for ungallantly racing the lady Ophelie. (this one is ethically challenging)
Celebrity Awards went to Snatch (Mum in the paper) and a double to Poumuli (TV3 and Observer). The GM then turned her attention to our new Super-Heroes, the two rescuers in the new VERTS, who both turned up wearing their silly yellow jackets. She made them look more like superheroes by having them wear underwear (ladies’) on the outside of their shorts and gave both SOTB and CB a down down. Opening up for nominations from the floor, SOTB said he had witnessed a near death experience, with a man nearly killed by the falling down of the HQ1 sign. Lewinsky began to quibble about witnesses, and since one could be produced, it became a double Lethal Weapon (Unloaded) Award. We then welcomed latecummer Kiss My Butt.
Dawn Raid sought to get Poumuli an award for losing his new hubcaps, but since Dawn Raid had been outside HQ1 during the theft and not seen it, the GM agreed to reverse the award. A leavers award was suggested by Godfather for Claire and Eileen. Before that, Eileen ventured deep into FBI territory with an award for Brazilian and Godfather. Apparently they both believe that Louis Armstrong sang “and dogs say goodnight” in “What a wonderful world”. In the end all four took the award. Zsa Zsa recounted how it was so wet during the run, and that Swinger had disappeared from the run with two ladies, in order to take, erm, pictures. Wannabe Pornographer Award to Swinger. This prompted SOTB to nominate Poumuli for a Wannabe Award (All Blacks) for wearing a NZ rugby-shirt (its almost an antique, and SOTB wears a Ireland shirt at times – deeply unfair). SOTB also insisted that DMT do the New Shoes Award, as she hadn’t run.
Ophelie piped up that she had an award for KMB, but was stopped short as she was supposed to be wearing the Dome of Silence. She was joined in the award by Carin, because Poumuli suddenly remembered that January 24th 41 AD was when the Romans killed Caligula, and called for a Caligula Removal Appreciation Award. Snatch, in a pique of annoyance, got an award for Vulture for asking if Greenie was her Father. COT had a story of getting drinks in a “fine” establishment, and a certain Hasher bought an ula for his wife and “leid” her from behind. While COT by rights should have joined Lewinsky for calling HQ1 “fine”, the gentleman took it well.
The GM closed the circle with a Culinary Appreciation Award to Godfather, and the traditional salute to the host and hare, Lewinsky and CB.
Next week’s hash, weather permitting, will be at Malololelei, and the week after at Taumeasina. Watch the blog for late changes in case the weather turns crappy.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Talofa Hashers - OK, now that Cyclone Wilma has left us, lets try this again! Monday the 31st of January 2011 run number 1553 will be hosted by yours truly and Wahoo, with Dawn Raid as the Hare, up at Malololelei. This area is up the Cross island road past the Bahai Temple but before Taito's famous tiled house. Look out for the turn off on Kelsey Lane. Continue on Kelsey lane when it becomes an unsealed road, past the Catholic compound on the right, then take the second left turn. A hash mark will be placed at the correct turnoff at that point. The "house" is about 100 metres up that track on the left.
We will cater this run, providing some BBQ chicken (other special sauce), so if you are chick-pea eating inclined you may want to bring something veggie (allright, maybe some salads). So bring your S15 for the keg and enjoy a new trail up at the top. We are hoping and praying for clement weather but be on the look out for rain, in which case we suggest bringing towels and wet weather gear.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Monday, January 24, 2011
Hash 1552
Dear all
further to the cancellation some have indicated willingness to run no matter what, and Lewinsky has offered us the use of On The Rocks again - because Godfather, always looking after us, has prepared some umu and a roast pig! So lets meet at On The Rocks - those who wish to run can do so, while the rest enjoy themselves!
On On
Poumuli
further to the cancellation some have indicated willingness to run no matter what, and Lewinsky has offered us the use of On The Rocks again - because Godfather, always looking after us, has prepared some umu and a roast pig! So lets meet at On The Rocks - those who wish to run can do so, while the rest enjoy themselves!
On On
Poumuli
CANCELLED - run 1552
Dear all Hashers
The weather is not cooperating with us. Up at the top its impossible to set a trail as the paper gets blown away or rained away, and the wind is pretty bad. So apoplogies but we will have to cancel for today unless someone has a safer and less wet venue!
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
The weather is not cooperating with us. Up at the top its impossible to set a trail as the paper gets blown away or rained away, and the wind is pretty bad. So apoplogies but we will have to cancel for today unless someone has a safer and less wet venue!
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Hash Run 1552
Talofa Hashers - Monday the 24th of January 2011 run number 1552 will be hosted by yours truly and Wahoo, with Dawn Raid as the Hare, up at Malololelei. This area is up the Cross island road past the Bahai Temple but before Taito's famous tiled house. Look out for the turn off on Kelsey Lane. Continue on Kelsey lane when it becomes an unsealed road, past the Catholic compound on the right, then take the second left turn. A hash mark will be placed at the correct turnoff at that point. The "house" is about 100 metres up that track on the left.
We will cater this run, providing some BBQ chicken (other special sauce), so if you are chick-pea eating inclined you may want to bring something veggie (allright, maybe some salads). So bring your S15 for the keg and enjoy a wet run in celebration of Wilma. Suggest bringing towels and wet weather gear.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Friday, January 21, 2011
Rakino Apia Sister Hash House Harriers (RASH3)
The RASH held its inaugural runs on Rakino Island outside of Auckland on the 13th and 14th of January, 2011. It is intended to be an occasional Hash to coincide with any Hashers visiting from Samoa wishing to brave the waves and go over to Charlie’s place on Rakino. As such it will remain a sister hash of Apia Hash and a home away from home.
The first run was a live hare run. While rule 69b had explicitly been put in abeyance, the Hare – Charlie – was quickly run down and thoroughly debagged by a lady called Barbarella (for true!). The run continued around the grassy knolls and unpaved roads until returning to the house, named Vailima, overlooking the bay.
Slit was the GM, and since this was a new hash, dispensed with that element, preferring instead a round of general introductions. For showing excessive sporting prowess, a Bringing Hash Into Disrepute was given to Barbarella. A few more awards were given but the Scribe was plastered. A brief naming ceremony was held for Charlie, who in light of his complete inability to keep his trap shut during AHHH circles, was named Verbal Diarrhoea (or VD for short). This was crowned off by Wahoo with eggs, soy sauce, chilli, beer and flour.
The second run was equally eventful, but happened as darkness set, so Scribe couldn’t complete report. In any event, Lisa, in light of her work as a copper, and being married to VD, was named ArtyArse (RTRS – right to remain silent), with similar excessive use of shampoo-requiring substances.
Photos will be posted of the debagging of the Hare once Wahoo gives Slit permission to play with the camera. Further runs will be organized once we get VD over for a visit to Samoa and can discuss with him.
On On
Slit
The first run was a live hare run. While rule 69b had explicitly been put in abeyance, the Hare – Charlie – was quickly run down and thoroughly debagged by a lady called Barbarella (for true!). The run continued around the grassy knolls and unpaved roads until returning to the house, named Vailima, overlooking the bay.
Slit was the GM, and since this was a new hash, dispensed with that element, preferring instead a round of general introductions. For showing excessive sporting prowess, a Bringing Hash Into Disrepute was given to Barbarella. A few more awards were given but the Scribe was plastered. A brief naming ceremony was held for Charlie, who in light of his complete inability to keep his trap shut during AHHH circles, was named Verbal Diarrhoea (or VD for short). This was crowned off by Wahoo with eggs, soy sauce, chilli, beer and flour.
The second run was equally eventful, but happened as darkness set, so Scribe couldn’t complete report. In any event, Lisa, in light of her work as a copper, and being married to VD, was named ArtyArse (RTRS – right to remain silent), with similar excessive use of shampoo-requiring substances.
Photos will be posted of the debagging of the Hare once Wahoo gives Slit permission to play with the camera. Further runs will be organized once we get VD over for a visit to Samoa and can discuss with him.
On On
Slit
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Hash Trash 1551
The hash was hosted by Lewinsky at On The Rocks, with gratitude from the whole of Apia Hash for getting us out of a bind of a sick Hare-raiser. It was decided to do a live hare run, which Swinger dutifully took on. He requested that rule 69b be held in abeyance (if a live hare is caught by the pack during the run he may be de-bagged, stripped, abused and violated) which was sort of agreed to. Off he went down Beach Road and the pack gave him the yardage advantage to the corner of the Police HQ on Ififi Street. Poumuli and Dan the Bonebreaker followed closely to try and keep him in sight. Down some side streets, behind some delightfully dirty sheds and back onto Vaea, then past Cappuccino Vineyard and onto the sea wall. Swinger was caught just outside Cappuccino by Dan, and almost got caught by Poumuli. But in an undignified show of athletic prowess Swinger turned on the after burner to avoid being unceremoniously stripped in front of On The Rocks. The pack slowly made their convergence on home, where the keg and Godfather’s sweet nuts awaited.
Poumuli volunteered to be GM, knowing that there were several awards pending that needed avoidance. Also scribing the event provided unprecedented power that was undeniable. There were a few new to Apia Hash – there was Tudorsniffer here in Apia for the first time, and Stacey from Arizona who had been brought by Pirate Princess. The rethreads were Lewinsky, Wahoo, Poumuli and Captain Mortein. Celebrity Awards went to Greenie, SOTB and Titty Galore (closest relative to YNot). The Shoe Inspector Snake did an interesting snarfle to check if Stacey’s shoes were new – they were not, but Godfather reminded that Ninja had avoided his award last Hash due to the cholera risk, so he took it this time – with Coke! In celebration of this year in history, the GM pointed out that today was the feast day of St Anthony the Great and tomorrow is for St Margaret, and called forth any who go by similar names in other circles of life. Not caring for SOTB’s protests at the spelling, SOTB and Fang took their awards.
The GM then enquired of Cockblocker what his idea for a down-down had been viz Swinger, and since this related to chatting attentively with females, the GM decreed that CB needed a Dereliction of Duty/Not Living Up To Hash Name Award, as there had been no signs of blocking. Turning to the run, the GM informed that he had been passed by a Hasher who looked like he would catch the Hare. Said Hasher asked what to do if he did, but didn’t comply with the order to “sod rule 69b”, so Swinger continued the run in dressed comfort. Another Dereliction of Duty Award to Don.
The GM also called out Swinger for speeding up when nearly caught the 2nd time – this time it was for Bringing Hash Into Disrepute – we are not an athletic sporting club, as Tallyho has reminded in the past. The GM then recounted how he had been brought to a wedding celebration only to be made to work to the point of collapse – which resulted in a Wrongful Husband Exhaustion Award to Wahoo. The chattering in the circle was becoming too much at this stage, so the GM awarded CB the Dome of Silence for the duration – didn’t stop the nattering nabob from continuing though, so perhaps we need to get some sort of wheel clamp attached to it. Snake asked where the GM had been able to secure so many interesting and colourful hats, surely it was some Adult Emporium, to which the GM riposted that they had been found during a break-in to Snake’s house while he was in New Zealand. Snake doubled his award by making reference to one of the saints listed above and his surprise that the burglars had found her special drawer.
Opening up for nominations, Pirate Princess nominated Stacey for the Leaving Hash Award as she departs these shores soon. SOTB nominated Lewinsky for his new record breaking landing of a marlin in just 5 minutes, but the GM ordered him to join in for an Open Adulation Award, as he was clearly jealously in awe. Swinger complained that this year the SamoaTel phone directory is half the size, and that it has left out many numbers including his place of work. As SOTB claimed he had quit his job, Swinger had to take the down down. But the GM pointed out that a smaller phone book was a good conservation measure, which is Swinger’s field, so he should have been happy. SOTB joined him through a slip of the tongue when he explained that “we use” rather than SamoaTel uses, hinting that his employment was not entirely at an end. Claire nominated Bruce for an award for whining about his wife’s shopping spree. This backfired as the GM, having gone through the same with his wife could only but sympathize. Wahoo joined the award after slapping the GM! Dogfood was spotted leaning. Lewinsky called for an award for our two newest lifesavers, CB and SOTB.
Godfather then noted that he had requested some Hashers to join him in a commemoration of our dear departed Shafter, but said Hashers SOTB and Lewinsky didn’t show up. Godfather joined them for some reason. Brazilian nominated Wane for putting work before the Hash, and he was joined by Dogfood for leaning yet again. Swinger nominated supposed chief navigator Captain Mortein for getting lost, which resulted in a Pirate Princess GPS Award – clearly some glitch in the software. Claire wanted to nominate a Hash Mere for a Scaredy Cat Award, but this was turned into a non-observance of Martin Luther King Day by the targeted Yank, and when one Yank drinks, all Yanks drink – Lewinsky, Wane, Fang, Lili and Stacey. Trying hard to get a last few out before the closing Claire nominated the French girls for looking so pretty. But Carin is Italian, so Claire joined Ophelie in the award. The host and the hare, Lewinsky and Swinger were saluted in the obligatory manner, with SOTB giving the GM an Achievement Award to close off the circle.
Pizzas had been ordered and served and Lili had brought some nice pastries. Next week the Hash will be at Malololelei, hosted by Poumuli and Wahoo, who will ensure that there is lots of jungle to cross.
At the request of Vai Vai we have included a video clip again, entitled Never Ever Drink So Much That This Happens. Parental guidance is advised.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Poumuli volunteered to be GM, knowing that there were several awards pending that needed avoidance. Also scribing the event provided unprecedented power that was undeniable. There were a few new to Apia Hash – there was Tudorsniffer here in Apia for the first time, and Stacey from Arizona who had been brought by Pirate Princess. The rethreads were Lewinsky, Wahoo, Poumuli and Captain Mortein. Celebrity Awards went to Greenie, SOTB and Titty Galore (closest relative to YNot). The Shoe Inspector Snake did an interesting snarfle to check if Stacey’s shoes were new – they were not, but Godfather reminded that Ninja had avoided his award last Hash due to the cholera risk, so he took it this time – with Coke! In celebration of this year in history, the GM pointed out that today was the feast day of St Anthony the Great and tomorrow is for St Margaret, and called forth any who go by similar names in other circles of life. Not caring for SOTB’s protests at the spelling, SOTB and Fang took their awards.
The GM then enquired of Cockblocker what his idea for a down-down had been viz Swinger, and since this related to chatting attentively with females, the GM decreed that CB needed a Dereliction of Duty/Not Living Up To Hash Name Award, as there had been no signs of blocking. Turning to the run, the GM informed that he had been passed by a Hasher who looked like he would catch the Hare. Said Hasher asked what to do if he did, but didn’t comply with the order to “sod rule 69b”, so Swinger continued the run in dressed comfort. Another Dereliction of Duty Award to Don.
The GM also called out Swinger for speeding up when nearly caught the 2nd time – this time it was for Bringing Hash Into Disrepute – we are not an athletic sporting club, as Tallyho has reminded in the past. The GM then recounted how he had been brought to a wedding celebration only to be made to work to the point of collapse – which resulted in a Wrongful Husband Exhaustion Award to Wahoo. The chattering in the circle was becoming too much at this stage, so the GM awarded CB the Dome of Silence for the duration – didn’t stop the nattering nabob from continuing though, so perhaps we need to get some sort of wheel clamp attached to it. Snake asked where the GM had been able to secure so many interesting and colourful hats, surely it was some Adult Emporium, to which the GM riposted that they had been found during a break-in to Snake’s house while he was in New Zealand. Snake doubled his award by making reference to one of the saints listed above and his surprise that the burglars had found her special drawer.
Opening up for nominations, Pirate Princess nominated Stacey for the Leaving Hash Award as she departs these shores soon. SOTB nominated Lewinsky for his new record breaking landing of a marlin in just 5 minutes, but the GM ordered him to join in for an Open Adulation Award, as he was clearly jealously in awe. Swinger complained that this year the SamoaTel phone directory is half the size, and that it has left out many numbers including his place of work. As SOTB claimed he had quit his job, Swinger had to take the down down. But the GM pointed out that a smaller phone book was a good conservation measure, which is Swinger’s field, so he should have been happy. SOTB joined him through a slip of the tongue when he explained that “we use” rather than SamoaTel uses, hinting that his employment was not entirely at an end. Claire nominated Bruce for an award for whining about his wife’s shopping spree. This backfired as the GM, having gone through the same with his wife could only but sympathize. Wahoo joined the award after slapping the GM! Dogfood was spotted leaning. Lewinsky called for an award for our two newest lifesavers, CB and SOTB.
Godfather then noted that he had requested some Hashers to join him in a commemoration of our dear departed Shafter, but said Hashers SOTB and Lewinsky didn’t show up. Godfather joined them for some reason. Brazilian nominated Wane for putting work before the Hash, and he was joined by Dogfood for leaning yet again. Swinger nominated supposed chief navigator Captain Mortein for getting lost, which resulted in a Pirate Princess GPS Award – clearly some glitch in the software. Claire wanted to nominate a Hash Mere for a Scaredy Cat Award, but this was turned into a non-observance of Martin Luther King Day by the targeted Yank, and when one Yank drinks, all Yanks drink – Lewinsky, Wane, Fang, Lili and Stacey. Trying hard to get a last few out before the closing Claire nominated the French girls for looking so pretty. But Carin is Italian, so Claire joined Ophelie in the award. The host and the hare, Lewinsky and Swinger were saluted in the obligatory manner, with SOTB giving the GM an Achievement Award to close off the circle.
Pizzas had been ordered and served and Lili had brought some nice pastries. Next week the Hash will be at Malololelei, hosted by Poumuli and Wahoo, who will ensure that there is lots of jungle to cross.
At the request of Vai Vai we have included a video clip again, entitled Never Ever Drink So Much That This Happens. Parental guidance is advised.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Hash Trash 1550
(Ed note - many thanks to Assistant Trainee Co-Scribe Screamer for the report. She has seriously benefited from her remedial English classes and may soon graduate to Adjutant Co-Scribe. Photos from Slippery will be posted soon. On On Poumuli, IKA Slit)
Hash 1550 looked like it was going to be yet another aborted event, what with a massive rainstorm sweeping across Apia town. However the two-keg promise combined with Hash being hosted at a bar seemed to do the trick - a small, but hardy group of Hashers turned up complete with wet-weather gear.
Cockblocker, newly returned from a sojourn in New Zealand, was live hare. Everyone took off along the waterfront, through Vaiala, around Apia Park, out by the UN road, through the village with all the dogs and back out along the river to the main road. A nice rapid run.
GM was Sassy Girl Blow Job.
She called the circle to order and invited up New Boots. There was one – Yasu from Japan who said she had not run but had come to drink. This was received well by the circle and Yasu showed that she is fit to stay.
Rethreads were numerous, few with any really good excuses – Jenny, Screamer, Snake (sheep shagging), Venom, Snake Bite, Dogfood (first time back in 8 years), Ninja (having a baby), Slippery, Dev (tired of everyone), Josh and CB (newly made Uncle).
There were two new shoes but Godfather reminded everyone of the infections that had resulted from the last run in Apia’s puddles and the circle grudgingly allowed Kiwi and Ninja leave from imbibing from their not-so-shiny shoes.
Dogfood was awarded for living up to his name and being attacked by a dog not too far into the run.
Snake and Dogfood were both awarded for some story long past whence Snake had run over a dog that Dogfood alleged had attacked him…turned out it was the wrong dog.
Chiliandrina (who had had to leave due to parental issues) and Zsa Zsa were given the foster parents award for taking on a host of children – Kiss My Butt, Carin, Ophelie and Josh also shared their drinks with their parents.
Clare was leading the GM astray by offering her cigarettes and Dev who wanted to borrow the cigarettes, both got awards.
Two more awards to Josh who had backed into someone’s car and to Wane who insists there in no “y” in his name (someone did suggest adding a “hi” in there somewhere though).
Titty Galore was given the special Prick award (we are still pondering this one) for going home late one night.
Floor was opened for nominations.
Snake’s award backfired when he nominated Godfather for not being on the news when he was back home with his mother. Snake took this on behalf of his mum.
Screamer and Kiss My Butt received awards for pranging Screamer’s car while KMB was on duty watching for strange objects in the back.
Greenie received one for something.
KMB started to put forward an award which was foiled by a slip of her tongue in naming someone called James. Then she took another because she was wearing sunglasses on her head.
Dev had Telephonus interruptus.
Wane was wearing kneebraces and Clare apparently did not like this. They both got an award.
Assistant Trainee Co-Scribe wonders if GM might not have been a tad under the weather herself when she gave out the Tit Award to Greenie for…failing to read the weather signs and bringing the impacts of Climate Change to Apia. Greenie took it like a man. More or less.
After this, things pretty much got out of hand as GM was caught smoking red-handed DURING the circle and nominations flew without apology.
The Hosts and the Hare were thanked – Jay, Patrick, SOTB and CB…they drank then all fell down in a huge dramatic wrap up of the circle.
On On
Screamer
Hash 1550 looked like it was going to be yet another aborted event, what with a massive rainstorm sweeping across Apia town. However the two-keg promise combined with Hash being hosted at a bar seemed to do the trick - a small, but hardy group of Hashers turned up complete with wet-weather gear.
Cockblocker, newly returned from a sojourn in New Zealand, was live hare. Everyone took off along the waterfront, through Vaiala, around Apia Park, out by the UN road, through the village with all the dogs and back out along the river to the main road. A nice rapid run.
GM was Sassy Girl Blow Job.
She called the circle to order and invited up New Boots. There was one – Yasu from Japan who said she had not run but had come to drink. This was received well by the circle and Yasu showed that she is fit to stay.
Rethreads were numerous, few with any really good excuses – Jenny, Screamer, Snake (sheep shagging), Venom, Snake Bite, Dogfood (first time back in 8 years), Ninja (having a baby), Slippery, Dev (tired of everyone), Josh and CB (newly made Uncle).
There were two new shoes but Godfather reminded everyone of the infections that had resulted from the last run in Apia’s puddles and the circle grudgingly allowed Kiwi and Ninja leave from imbibing from their not-so-shiny shoes.
Dogfood was awarded for living up to his name and being attacked by a dog not too far into the run.
Snake and Dogfood were both awarded for some story long past whence Snake had run over a dog that Dogfood alleged had attacked him…turned out it was the wrong dog.
Chiliandrina (who had had to leave due to parental issues) and Zsa Zsa were given the foster parents award for taking on a host of children – Kiss My Butt, Carin, Ophelie and Josh also shared their drinks with their parents.
Clare was leading the GM astray by offering her cigarettes and Dev who wanted to borrow the cigarettes, both got awards.
Two more awards to Josh who had backed into someone’s car and to Wane who insists there in no “y” in his name (someone did suggest adding a “hi” in there somewhere though).
Titty Galore was given the special Prick award (we are still pondering this one) for going home late one night.
Floor was opened for nominations.
Snake’s award backfired when he nominated Godfather for not being on the news when he was back home with his mother. Snake took this on behalf of his mum.
Screamer and Kiss My Butt received awards for pranging Screamer’s car while KMB was on duty watching for strange objects in the back.
Greenie received one for something.
KMB started to put forward an award which was foiled by a slip of her tongue in naming someone called James. Then she took another because she was wearing sunglasses on her head.
Dev had Telephonus interruptus.
Wane was wearing kneebraces and Clare apparently did not like this. They both got an award.
Assistant Trainee Co-Scribe wonders if GM might not have been a tad under the weather herself when she gave out the Tit Award to Greenie for…failing to read the weather signs and bringing the impacts of Climate Change to Apia. Greenie took it like a man. More or less.
After this, things pretty much got out of hand as GM was caught smoking red-handed DURING the circle and nominations flew without apology.
The Hosts and the Hare were thanked – Jay, Patrick, SOTB and CB…they drank then all fell down in a huge dramatic wrap up of the circle.
On On
Screamer
Monday, January 17, 2011
Hash Run 1551 at On The Rocks
Happy New Year's to all Hashers and apologies for the late posting. Tonight's hash will be hosted by Lewinsky at HQ1, also known as On The Rocks, on Beach Road in town. It will be a live-hare run. Given the weather we will not be able to break out the BBQ, but hopefully all who are able to can bring some ready dishes to share for this BYO run. The keg has already been delivered!
So bring your wet-weather running gear and head down to On The Rocks for the usual 5.30 PM start, and let's make it a good one, despite the conditions.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
So bring your wet-weather running gear and head down to On The Rocks for the usual 5.30 PM start, and let's make it a good one, despite the conditions.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
VERTS Volunteers
Hi All, Is there anyone interested in joining up with the Volunteer Emergency Response Team (Maritime) section? If so, please get in touch with CB or SOTB. We need more people to help out in times of disaster with search and rescue, Life saving, community awareness programs, etc.
If you have some boating background and love being outdoors and in the water, let us know ASAP..There is a lot of fun training ahead of us and lots of time outdoors.
Get in touch with us if you are keen and we can fill you in.
On On
If you have some boating background and love being outdoors and in the water, let us know ASAP..There is a lot of fun training ahead of us and lots of time outdoors.
Get in touch with us if you are keen and we can fill you in.
On On
Monday, January 10, 2011
Hash Run 1550 - Y-Not Matautu
Morning All,
Hash Run 1550 will be at Ynot Bar at Matautu next to paddles. Seeing as it will be a big one and that there are 2 kegs...we'll have it in town. If you can, please car pool otherwise bring a sober driver.lol
The run will be a BYO Food for the BBQ Run, so please bring something to contribute to the spread. Run wil start normal time at 1730 HRS and also bring a change of clothes in case it rains..
No Map needed. Just head down to Ynot at Matauau next door to Paddles Restaurant
ON ON
Hash Run 1550 will be at Ynot Bar at Matautu next to paddles. Seeing as it will be a big one and that there are 2 kegs...we'll have it in town. If you can, please car pool otherwise bring a sober driver.lol
The run will be a BYO Food for the BBQ Run, so please bring something to contribute to the spread. Run wil start normal time at 1730 HRS and also bring a change of clothes in case it rains..
No Map needed. Just head down to Ynot at Matauau next door to Paddles Restaurant
ON ON
Monday, January 03, 2011
Hash Run 1550 Run- Cancelled
Morning All, Hash run 1550 has been canceled/postponed till further notice due to the weather. Unfortunately we dont have a proper tent, only shade cloths, so we'll be soaked and sick. We will post more info on when we will hold the run, possibly sometime this week when the weather clears up. On On
Friday, December 31, 2010
Hash Run 1550- Day at the races- Part 2
Morning All,
Seeing as last week was such a blast, next weeks run will be another Day at the races at the Faleata Race Track. Please note that this is a BYO Food for the BBQ, so please bring something for the BBQ unless you aren't interested in eating..haha
In any case, the run will start at 1pm and there will most likely be a live hare unless someone wants to set the run. Please bring your drinking vessels and the normal gear for the day..There will also be a keg on the day.
On On
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Hash Trash 1549
Kia Ora from Auckland, where your Scribe and Wahoo are recuperating. The Hash was hosted by Godfather at the Faleata Horse Race Track. Given that it was a public holiday for sure the Hashers would make a mess of a starting time of 1 PM. Sure enough, the only people there when your Scribe turned up was Sassygirl BJ and SOTB. When Godfather was finally located his estimated time of arrival was not amenable to getting the run off and the beer flowing. Hence around 8 hashers set off for a walk/run around Faleata. A fairly short and sharp affair, but it got the juices flowing. At this point Godfather had turned up, and with the help of a few strong hashers, had succeeded in erecting his tents. He then decided that the lates had to run, and led them off around the compound for a much longer sojourn. But all were by now well set for the circle, which acting GM Sassy called to order.
There were a few new to hash – Sione from Australia, Alfred, Mere, Mo and Tua from Suva, and Vala from the US. The rethreads were BB (holidaying in Suva), FBI (boring other people), Jay (wishes he had been on holiday) and Uncle Fred. FBI got a double for sowing his oats in soil that he isn’t married to.
The GM set off a series of awards, giving Godfather the Latecummer Award for his unsharp arrival. Since we were at the races, one of the hash meres had been admiring the horses, but timidly asked the technical question if women jockeys can lose their virginity – Tash got this Equestrian Award. One of the hashers had turned up with a cowboy hat that looked suspiciously like a movie prop, so Pat got the Brokeback Mountain Award (where did the GM see that movie – thought it was banned in Samoa?).
On this day in history, it was the Feast Day of St James the Just (Swinger) and also the day with the largest mass hanging in history, thanks to the US who strung up 38 Indians in 1862 (Wayne and Vala). Wayne and Swinger took a double for wearing hats and glasses. Celebrity awards went to Godfather, Swinger, Poumuli, Wahoo and Uncle Fred for being in the Observer. Jay joined in for having repeatedly tested the strength of the tent by leaning on it.
A special thank you award went to SOTB for getting the beer and GM organized so a Wake Up Call Award to SOTB. The GM also took on a self promoting new hasher who claimed to be an excellent masseur with extra benefits – a Happy Ending Award to Sione, who got it doubled for starting too early.
Opening up for nominations from the floor, SOTB informed us of how a hasher had turned down an offer for a drink with Godfather in favour of resting up for the arrival of his girlfriend- Horrendous Choice Award to Swinger. SOTB also nominated the newly appointed Samoan paddling coach Jay for the Athletic Award. Wahoo also nominated Jay for his offensive tshirt – something about smoking, licking etc, but this was deemed appropriate gear, so Wahoo, Titty Galore and Tash took the down down for getting offended not aroused.
The GM had spotted a hasher playing around with Godfather’s sweet nuts – Dawn Raid got the Inappropriate Fondling Award. SOTB nominated the GM for a down down for not getting things organized, and was joined by Eveready – didn’t catch all of it but it was something related to Mr. Sassy. Jay recounted that over Christmas he had invited friends over for drinks, except that one stayed and then didn’t help clean up. After a vote it was agreed that the Slob Award for SOTB should be doubled, but that Jay should join in for Lack of Appreciation for Hashman-like Behaviour.
The GM had ruled earlier that only the elderly guests were allowed to sit, and she now spotted Ollie sitting. She also highlighted the great efforts of our new hasher at the UN, who only turns up to the Hash to try the brew – Saneka got the Just Gets Pissed Award. FBI nominated BB for the meagre Christmas presents brought back, which should have earned him an Ungrateful Award. But in true style he outdid himself a few seconds later and brought a Verbal Diarrhoea Award on himself. Swinger brought a complaint against BB as well relating to the non-arrival of his Christmas card, to which BB responded “why does he need a card when he’s got this” and suggestively posed. Unanimous vote gave Swinger the award.
At this point the GM wanted to close off the circle, and nominated the BBQ chefs Pat and SOTB, as well as their Foretaster –Poumuli. We then saluted the host and the hare – Clem stepped in for Godfather, while Poumuli was singled out as hare, resulting in the beer coming out of his nose.
The Hash then enjoyed the races and the BBQ. Dawn Raid was spotted sun worshipping later and this needs an award.
Next week’s run will also be at the racetrack. Its run number 1550 so a special one for the Apia Hash. Check the blog for any last minute details.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
There were a few new to hash – Sione from Australia, Alfred, Mere, Mo and Tua from Suva, and Vala from the US. The rethreads were BB (holidaying in Suva), FBI (boring other people), Jay (wishes he had been on holiday) and Uncle Fred. FBI got a double for sowing his oats in soil that he isn’t married to.
The GM set off a series of awards, giving Godfather the Latecummer Award for his unsharp arrival. Since we were at the races, one of the hash meres had been admiring the horses, but timidly asked the technical question if women jockeys can lose their virginity – Tash got this Equestrian Award. One of the hashers had turned up with a cowboy hat that looked suspiciously like a movie prop, so Pat got the Brokeback Mountain Award (where did the GM see that movie – thought it was banned in Samoa?).
On this day in history, it was the Feast Day of St James the Just (Swinger) and also the day with the largest mass hanging in history, thanks to the US who strung up 38 Indians in 1862 (Wayne and Vala). Wayne and Swinger took a double for wearing hats and glasses. Celebrity awards went to Godfather, Swinger, Poumuli, Wahoo and Uncle Fred for being in the Observer. Jay joined in for having repeatedly tested the strength of the tent by leaning on it.
A special thank you award went to SOTB for getting the beer and GM organized so a Wake Up Call Award to SOTB. The GM also took on a self promoting new hasher who claimed to be an excellent masseur with extra benefits – a Happy Ending Award to Sione, who got it doubled for starting too early.
Opening up for nominations from the floor, SOTB informed us of how a hasher had turned down an offer for a drink with Godfather in favour of resting up for the arrival of his girlfriend- Horrendous Choice Award to Swinger. SOTB also nominated the newly appointed Samoan paddling coach Jay for the Athletic Award. Wahoo also nominated Jay for his offensive tshirt – something about smoking, licking etc, but this was deemed appropriate gear, so Wahoo, Titty Galore and Tash took the down down for getting offended not aroused.
The GM had spotted a hasher playing around with Godfather’s sweet nuts – Dawn Raid got the Inappropriate Fondling Award. SOTB nominated the GM for a down down for not getting things organized, and was joined by Eveready – didn’t catch all of it but it was something related to Mr. Sassy. Jay recounted that over Christmas he had invited friends over for drinks, except that one stayed and then didn’t help clean up. After a vote it was agreed that the Slob Award for SOTB should be doubled, but that Jay should join in for Lack of Appreciation for Hashman-like Behaviour.
The GM had ruled earlier that only the elderly guests were allowed to sit, and she now spotted Ollie sitting. She also highlighted the great efforts of our new hasher at the UN, who only turns up to the Hash to try the brew – Saneka got the Just Gets Pissed Award. FBI nominated BB for the meagre Christmas presents brought back, which should have earned him an Ungrateful Award. But in true style he outdid himself a few seconds later and brought a Verbal Diarrhoea Award on himself. Swinger brought a complaint against BB as well relating to the non-arrival of his Christmas card, to which BB responded “why does he need a card when he’s got this” and suggestively posed. Unanimous vote gave Swinger the award.
At this point the GM wanted to close off the circle, and nominated the BBQ chefs Pat and SOTB, as well as their Foretaster –Poumuli. We then saluted the host and the hare – Clem stepped in for Godfather, while Poumuli was singled out as hare, resulting in the beer coming out of his nose.
The Hash then enjoyed the races and the BBQ. Dawn Raid was spotted sun worshipping later and this needs an award.
Next week’s run will also be at the racetrack. Its run number 1550 so a special one for the Apia Hash. Check the blog for any last minute details.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Friday, December 24, 2010
Hash Run 1549- Faleata Race Track/Turf Club
Morning, Hash next week will be a BYO Food Run at the Faleata Turf Club/Race Track. The run will start at 1pm. We will have our own Hash Tent setup and the Keg and BBQ will be there so bring something to throw on the BBQ or if you want, bring something pre cooked. Also, please bring your own drinking vessel and if you want to party all day long, then bring extra drinks in the event that the keg runs out..which it probably will...Bring what you would normally bring to the beach..bar the swimming gear.. Map is posted below. On On and Have a Merry Xmas! 
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Hash Trash 1548
The Hash was hosted by Chilindrina, Carin and Ophelie off Bank Street in Vaoala. Zsa Zsa came late from work so few of us got to see him. Ring Ring was our Hare, and she had come to some agreement with Chili that there should be a run, then Zumba. Some of us were not that convinced. Anyway, the pack set off down Bank Street towards familiar grounds, led by Cockblocker and Poumuli. As we crossed the river stream, none of us bothered to check left as we have gone wrong there so many times. Er, not this time. We reacquired the trail at the top of the hill only to find ourselves back down in the stream. A protesting Ring Ring tried to get the pack to cooperate, but since we knew now where it all ended up, it was quicker to take the road route. This in turn led us under some treacherous barbed wire and into the cow pastures, where there was plenty of povipoo. Out again and under more barbed wire, we eventually just lost the trail at a falsie cross. No one actually figured out how to get back, so we all ran up the street again to have a taste of Godfathers sweet nuts.
Then Chili puts on a tight leotard, starts up the salsa music and expects all the sweating hashers to line up and, well, zumba. Sorry, but your Scribe was too stiff from the run (and was punished for it) so stood back and watched. Quite a display, as the ranks progressively got thinned out. Godfather stood out as a keen zumba’er, as well as one of the last to cease!
Sassygirl BJ stepped in as GM for the evening, and called forth those new to Hash. There was Claire from Rotorua, staying in Poutasi for 6 weeks teaching ukulele and guitar to the kids there. She brought the house down by claiming to have been brought by someone called Joey? Joy? She is accompanied by Eileen who will be assisting. Then there was Samuel from Bordeaux, who is a schoolteacher. Then there was Anne from Auckland who has been here since May and not come to Hash! Finally we have new recruits in Fig Man and Banana Doctor, from the UK and Dominican Republic respectively. The GM ordered a down down for Godfather and Claire.
The rethreads were Poumuli (saving the world in Cancun), Dawn Raid (sick), Lily (stuck in Savaii), Flo (back visiting from NZ) AND Brazilian Wax (been to Germany?). CB and SOTB (I am sure it actually stands for Satan’s Other Toy Boy) had spiked the down down with tequila (well only your Scribe’s), and were suitably punished by the GM. But she brought in Poumuli for a Perving Award for not joining in the zumba.
Hot Nuts was given the New Grandchild Award, just as Titty Galore was spotted sneaking in. She valiantly tried to get out of it but no dice. The GM recounted how while on the trail a good samaritan had tempted some hashers with the offer of a chariot ride – Lucifer Award to Tiger Woody.
The GM then asked your Scribe to tell the Hash what had happened on This Day in History. While there were several related to Lewinsky, he was absent so the only tidbit was that in 1994, the hitherto dormant Mexican volcano Popocatepel erupted, and your Scribe wondered if we had any other Mexican volcanoes! Chilindrina was most definitely not dormant! Poumuli had to join the award for getting Sassy’s celebrity front page wrong. (Should have let Dawn Raid take that one, as he brought me the paper!) However, a true celebrity was found in that in Mexico there is an entire class of peanuts called Snatch!
Opening it up for nominations from the floor, SOTB brought that old chestnut of how a seasoned hasher like Captain Mortein still cannot open a coconut. CB sought to have the grumpy one punished further for perving at the zumba and moving around for a better view, but after a vote this became a double for CB instead.
Brazilian diplomatically enquired whose son this was that he spotted leaning – step forward Greenie for not giving better paternal instructions, and he was joined by Pat who was trying to hold up one of the tables. Late arrival Saneka joined them.
Winner of the last Chicken Award Dawn Raid, decided to give the Chicken Award to Fig Man for surreptitiously appropriating the chicken hat before his time, and then not wearing it. Next week Fig Man, you can have your revenge, but better make it a good one!
Brazilian again diplomatically enquired as to the Hash rules regarding destruction of property, pointing to the two kids digging up Chili’s lawn – Fig Man and Banana Doctor took the Offspring with Chains Award.
Eveready had been shocked out of his seat on Sunday while watching the televised church service and spotting Wahoo and Poumuli there – no arguments, but should have been brought in under the celebrity awards.
Anne from Auckland and her husband after a lengthy intro each got a down down, apparently the first time for her in public. Bringing forth some Hashit from the last run, Greenie said he had found some pink running shoes under his bed! Carin owned up to the shoes, but knew not of their location, she claimed.
Pussysnatcher complained that there was an unusual amount of chatter in the circle and demanded that a new method of enforcing politeness be introduced. Luckily Poumuli had brought a Mexican wrestling mask which was placed on Captain Mortein’s head after he took the Dome of Silence Award.
At this stage the GM had the bright idea of a boat race – 4 guys, 4 gals. SOTB, Brazilian, Samuel and Kiwi easily defeated Sassy, Wahoo, Jo and Flo. Hot Nuts admitted that he had been the chatterer to get Captain into trouble, and self-nominated.
The GM caught Kiss My Butt coming late, but also in full advertising mode. Meanwhile, Snatch had been forced to drive over the hill to the beach so that 2 Hashmen could cycle across. So much for speed cycling, as she had to wait for hours for them. Slow Nuts and Pansy took their Slow Ride Award. Somehow inspired by this, the GM did an advertisement for our new osteopaths, in residence at Roseberg’s, and Dan took the resultant down down for the GM.
Claire informed the Hash of some dastardly deed that almost led to chariot riding, namely that as newcomers they had been misled by Sassy and Flo to get in the truck! Samuel tried to get Snatch for misleading him – she had met him 4 months ago, told him when in Apia to come to the party, but nothing about the running! The GM told him off with a “what more do you want” remark. Finally, Kiss My Butt saw Snatch and Pussysnatcher making out in the bushes during the circle, so they took their Get A Room Award.
The hosts and the hare were saluted, before we descended on a large spread of curries, rice, bbq and salads provided by our generous hosts.
Check the blog for next week’s run, but rumour has it that we might be off to the races! Tallyho.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Then Chili puts on a tight leotard, starts up the salsa music and expects all the sweating hashers to line up and, well, zumba. Sorry, but your Scribe was too stiff from the run (and was punished for it) so stood back and watched. Quite a display, as the ranks progressively got thinned out. Godfather stood out as a keen zumba’er, as well as one of the last to cease!
Sassygirl BJ stepped in as GM for the evening, and called forth those new to Hash. There was Claire from Rotorua, staying in Poutasi for 6 weeks teaching ukulele and guitar to the kids there. She brought the house down by claiming to have been brought by someone called Joey? Joy? She is accompanied by Eileen who will be assisting. Then there was Samuel from Bordeaux, who is a schoolteacher. Then there was Anne from Auckland who has been here since May and not come to Hash! Finally we have new recruits in Fig Man and Banana Doctor, from the UK and Dominican Republic respectively. The GM ordered a down down for Godfather and Claire.
The rethreads were Poumuli (saving the world in Cancun), Dawn Raid (sick), Lily (stuck in Savaii), Flo (back visiting from NZ) AND Brazilian Wax (been to Germany?). CB and SOTB (I am sure it actually stands for Satan’s Other Toy Boy) had spiked the down down with tequila (well only your Scribe’s), and were suitably punished by the GM. But she brought in Poumuli for a Perving Award for not joining in the zumba.
Hot Nuts was given the New Grandchild Award, just as Titty Galore was spotted sneaking in. She valiantly tried to get out of it but no dice. The GM recounted how while on the trail a good samaritan had tempted some hashers with the offer of a chariot ride – Lucifer Award to Tiger Woody.
The GM then asked your Scribe to tell the Hash what had happened on This Day in History. While there were several related to Lewinsky, he was absent so the only tidbit was that in 1994, the hitherto dormant Mexican volcano Popocatepel erupted, and your Scribe wondered if we had any other Mexican volcanoes! Chilindrina was most definitely not dormant! Poumuli had to join the award for getting Sassy’s celebrity front page wrong. (Should have let Dawn Raid take that one, as he brought me the paper!) However, a true celebrity was found in that in Mexico there is an entire class of peanuts called Snatch!
Opening it up for nominations from the floor, SOTB brought that old chestnut of how a seasoned hasher like Captain Mortein still cannot open a coconut. CB sought to have the grumpy one punished further for perving at the zumba and moving around for a better view, but after a vote this became a double for CB instead.
Brazilian diplomatically enquired whose son this was that he spotted leaning – step forward Greenie for not giving better paternal instructions, and he was joined by Pat who was trying to hold up one of the tables. Late arrival Saneka joined them.
Winner of the last Chicken Award Dawn Raid, decided to give the Chicken Award to Fig Man for surreptitiously appropriating the chicken hat before his time, and then not wearing it. Next week Fig Man, you can have your revenge, but better make it a good one!
Brazilian again diplomatically enquired as to the Hash rules regarding destruction of property, pointing to the two kids digging up Chili’s lawn – Fig Man and Banana Doctor took the Offspring with Chains Award.
Eveready had been shocked out of his seat on Sunday while watching the televised church service and spotting Wahoo and Poumuli there – no arguments, but should have been brought in under the celebrity awards.
Anne from Auckland and her husband after a lengthy intro each got a down down, apparently the first time for her in public. Bringing forth some Hashit from the last run, Greenie said he had found some pink running shoes under his bed! Carin owned up to the shoes, but knew not of their location, she claimed.
Pussysnatcher complained that there was an unusual amount of chatter in the circle and demanded that a new method of enforcing politeness be introduced. Luckily Poumuli had brought a Mexican wrestling mask which was placed on Captain Mortein’s head after he took the Dome of Silence Award.
At this stage the GM had the bright idea of a boat race – 4 guys, 4 gals. SOTB, Brazilian, Samuel and Kiwi easily defeated Sassy, Wahoo, Jo and Flo. Hot Nuts admitted that he had been the chatterer to get Captain into trouble, and self-nominated.
The GM caught Kiss My Butt coming late, but also in full advertising mode. Meanwhile, Snatch had been forced to drive over the hill to the beach so that 2 Hashmen could cycle across. So much for speed cycling, as she had to wait for hours for them. Slow Nuts and Pansy took their Slow Ride Award. Somehow inspired by this, the GM did an advertisement for our new osteopaths, in residence at Roseberg’s, and Dan took the resultant down down for the GM.
Claire informed the Hash of some dastardly deed that almost led to chariot riding, namely that as newcomers they had been misled by Sassy and Flo to get in the truck! Samuel tried to get Snatch for misleading him – she had met him 4 months ago, told him when in Apia to come to the party, but nothing about the running! The GM told him off with a “what more do you want” remark. Finally, Kiss My Butt saw Snatch and Pussysnatcher making out in the bushes during the circle, so they took their Get A Room Award.
The hosts and the hare were saluted, before we descended on a large spread of curries, rice, bbq and salads provided by our generous hosts.
Check the blog for next week’s run, but rumour has it that we might be off to the races! Tallyho.
On On
Poumuli, IKA Slit
Monday, December 20, 2010
Hash Run 1548- Vaoala, Bank St
Morning,
Todays hash run will be hosted by Chilliandrina, Zsa Zsa, Carin & Ophelie at Zsa Zsa's house on Bank Street in Vaoala.
This is NOT a BYO Run, the food will be provided by the hosts...Indian im told.. so bring a change of clothes as it gets cool in the evenings and your drinking boots.
YES, there will be a keg...and cold nuts...
Directions: Head up Cross Island Rd and turn off on Bank Street, head down Bank St and take the Left Turn before the main road heads downhill (where Bits & Pieces and Goer used to live) Head up the road and look out for the turn off ont he Right hand side.
Check the Map for more details.
On On
Todays hash run will be hosted by Chilliandrina, Zsa Zsa, Carin & Ophelie at Zsa Zsa's house on Bank Street in Vaoala.
This is NOT a BYO Run, the food will be provided by the hosts...Indian im told.. so bring a change of clothes as it gets cool in the evenings and your drinking boots.
YES, there will be a keg...and cold nuts...
Directions: Head up Cross Island Rd and turn off on Bank Street, head down Bank St and take the Left Turn before the main road heads downhill (where Bits & Pieces and Goer used to live) Head up the road and look out for the turn off ont he Right hand side.
Check the Map for more details.
On On
Monday, December 13, 2010
Hash Run 1547- Greenie, Vailele Uta
Afternoon, apologies for the late posting. Hash today will be hosted by Greenie at his home in Vailele Uta. The map is a bit sketchy, but head up towards Vailele Uta and the house is next to Samoa Primary School. Use the map and your hash skills to find the place.
There are 2 maps and they both point to the same place. Call Greenie on 7771414 if you cant find the place...
Please note that this is a BYO Food Run and there will be a keg.
On ON
There are 2 maps and they both point to the same place. Call Greenie on 7771414 if you cant find the place...
Please note that this is a BYO Food Run and there will be a keg.
On ON
Friday, December 03, 2010
Hash Trash 1545
(Ed note - thanks to Spanky for obviously assisting Screamer with her remedial English - only a few typos this time around. Hope you all enjoy the Christmas Run - Feliz Navidad and hasta la pasta from Poumuli, IKA Slit in Cancun)
Hash 1545 was held at Slippery’s and Frances’ home. This was the Thanksgiving Hash – more on that later.
The run was set by Hareraiser, Ring Ring. A familiar run that commenced with a few panicked looks as hashers recalled the last run from Slippery’s that had them running over mountains and down valleys for more than an hour. This week’s run was less taxing but the heat ensured that there were some very tired runners by the end of it.
GM Princess of Darkness commenced proceedings and welcomed a long list of those new to Apia Hash. These included Jana, her husband (why do people mumble their names??)(why are Assistant Trainee Scribes too pissed to pay attention?), Salu (who came with Do Me Twice), Virginia, Jochen, Brigitte, Dietrich and a number of others who had come from Germany to help Harlich celebrate his 60th birthday in Apia.
Rethreads were Sassy, Vera, Harlich and Black Adder. Ring Ring insisted that Vulture was a rethread and had to drink for a false accusation.
There were no new shoes but Snake, the inspector, needed a drink and this was duly administered.
Salu and Karin took a celebrity award for holding the flag for stopping violence against women. Ninja had also been in the news as was Godfather. Snake had to join Godfather as it seems Snake’s mum spends an unseemly amount of time checking out Godfather on TV. Sassy Girl BJ received a rather special celebrity award – for a movie suspiciously titled “My Sassy Girl” – rented out by no less than Captain Mortein. They shared centre circle.
The Good Samaritan (Dumbarse Section) award of the week went to Swinger who, after giving three policemen a ride into town, discovered they had made off with his camera.
Tramp and Woman in Black are in town but did not front up to Hash due to various ailments so the two women dressed in black – Brigitte? (one of Harlich’s party) and Salu drank on WIB’s behalf while Tramp was well-represented by Greenie.
Karin was caught leaning.
Assistant Trainee Scribe had not got the scribings done on time (she had managed to send them out at 5:05pm that day) and GM has been receiving complaints from Poumuli (currently in Cancun) on this. Wahoo also took one on behalf of Poumuli who seems to spend an excessive amount of time checking the blog when on work travel (Absolute bollocks, just checking it once in a while). Romeo had cellphonus interruptus and Brynne arrived just in time so everyone shared the circle centre.
Tasha told Sass she would be wearing a “V” -String to hash next week…we are all waiting with bated breath.
Godfather had tried to mow down a Hash Mere on the cross island road when trying to get to family lunch on time on Sunday. This could become a regular award for GF.
DMT had managed to ruin two car tyres in one week – dropping the car in the same pothole, according to SOTB.
Pirate Princess had declined Eveready’s offer to open one of Godfather’s nuts for her because she claimed she had brought her own nutcracker…seems she was referring to Captain Mortein.
Black Adder was leaving the country and leaving behind a pile of shit (at the newly constructed and very smelly waste water treatment plant in Mulinuu) according to Sassy. Snake was also brought up for the dodgy wiring he’d installed. Black Adder was also farewelled in the circle and he added that every minute with hash had been enjoyable.
Jana and her husband were cited for chatting incessantly. There was some talk that Greenie was involved but he somehow managed to keep out of the centre.
Angela is leaving for some time so she was farewelled with a drink.
At about this stage it was clear the keg was next to empty….HOW, Assistant Trainee Scribe wonders. So the hare (Ring Ring) and the hosts, Slippery and Eveready (who drank a soft drink which was just as well, given the beer situation) were thanked and then we were reminded that this was the Thanksgiving Hash. Godfather and Brynne explained the meaning and purpose of this American tradition, which has now become firmly integrated in Apia Hash. He also used the opportunity to encourage hashers to give to the Lifeline fundraising drive (Lifeline is a phone counseling service that deals with suicide). Deadline for donations (to DMT) is Monday next week.
Eveready and Karaoke were thanked for the turkeys they had cooked, the food was blessed and hungry (and thankful) hashers descended.
Next hash is the Christmas Hash and will be held at the Snake Pit in town. Hashers are asked to come in their Christmas costumes. They will run to different bars in town, sing Christmas carols and drink a lot. Everyone is asked to come in a taxi or have a designated driver who won’t be drinking.
Addendum – after dinner, hashers were treated to a surprise visit from the Monk. Beers had been brought in and a quick naming ceremony commenced. Brynne shall now be known as Kiss My Butt for her amazing flexibility displayed at yoga while Angela was named Wax for her affiliations with Brazilian Wax.
On On.
Screamer
Hash 1545 was held at Slippery’s and Frances’ home. This was the Thanksgiving Hash – more on that later.
The run was set by Hareraiser, Ring Ring. A familiar run that commenced with a few panicked looks as hashers recalled the last run from Slippery’s that had them running over mountains and down valleys for more than an hour. This week’s run was less taxing but the heat ensured that there were some very tired runners by the end of it.
GM Princess of Darkness commenced proceedings and welcomed a long list of those new to Apia Hash. These included Jana, her husband (why do people mumble their names??)(why are Assistant Trainee Scribes too pissed to pay attention?), Salu (who came with Do Me Twice), Virginia, Jochen, Brigitte, Dietrich and a number of others who had come from Germany to help Harlich celebrate his 60th birthday in Apia.
Rethreads were Sassy, Vera, Harlich and Black Adder. Ring Ring insisted that Vulture was a rethread and had to drink for a false accusation.
There were no new shoes but Snake, the inspector, needed a drink and this was duly administered.
Salu and Karin took a celebrity award for holding the flag for stopping violence against women. Ninja had also been in the news as was Godfather. Snake had to join Godfather as it seems Snake’s mum spends an unseemly amount of time checking out Godfather on TV. Sassy Girl BJ received a rather special celebrity award – for a movie suspiciously titled “My Sassy Girl” – rented out by no less than Captain Mortein. They shared centre circle.
The Good Samaritan (Dumbarse Section) award of the week went to Swinger who, after giving three policemen a ride into town, discovered they had made off with his camera.
Tramp and Woman in Black are in town but did not front up to Hash due to various ailments so the two women dressed in black – Brigitte? (one of Harlich’s party) and Salu drank on WIB’s behalf while Tramp was well-represented by Greenie.
Karin was caught leaning.
Assistant Trainee Scribe had not got the scribings done on time (she had managed to send them out at 5:05pm that day) and GM has been receiving complaints from Poumuli (currently in Cancun) on this. Wahoo also took one on behalf of Poumuli who seems to spend an excessive amount of time checking the blog when on work travel (Absolute bollocks, just checking it once in a while). Romeo had cellphonus interruptus and Brynne arrived just in time so everyone shared the circle centre.
Tasha told Sass she would be wearing a “V” -String to hash next week…we are all waiting with bated breath.
Godfather had tried to mow down a Hash Mere on the cross island road when trying to get to family lunch on time on Sunday. This could become a regular award for GF.
DMT had managed to ruin two car tyres in one week – dropping the car in the same pothole, according to SOTB.
Pirate Princess had declined Eveready’s offer to open one of Godfather’s nuts for her because she claimed she had brought her own nutcracker…seems she was referring to Captain Mortein.
Black Adder was leaving the country and leaving behind a pile of shit (at the newly constructed and very smelly waste water treatment plant in Mulinuu) according to Sassy. Snake was also brought up for the dodgy wiring he’d installed. Black Adder was also farewelled in the circle and he added that every minute with hash had been enjoyable.
Jana and her husband were cited for chatting incessantly. There was some talk that Greenie was involved but he somehow managed to keep out of the centre.
Angela is leaving for some time so she was farewelled with a drink.
At about this stage it was clear the keg was next to empty….HOW, Assistant Trainee Scribe wonders. So the hare (Ring Ring) and the hosts, Slippery and Eveready (who drank a soft drink which was just as well, given the beer situation) were thanked and then we were reminded that this was the Thanksgiving Hash. Godfather and Brynne explained the meaning and purpose of this American tradition, which has now become firmly integrated in Apia Hash. He also used the opportunity to encourage hashers to give to the Lifeline fundraising drive (Lifeline is a phone counseling service that deals with suicide). Deadline for donations (to DMT) is Monday next week.
Eveready and Karaoke were thanked for the turkeys they had cooked, the food was blessed and hungry (and thankful) hashers descended.
Next hash is the Christmas Hash and will be held at the Snake Pit in town. Hashers are asked to come in their Christmas costumes. They will run to different bars in town, sing Christmas carols and drink a lot. Everyone is asked to come in a taxi or have a designated driver who won’t be drinking.
Addendum – after dinner, hashers were treated to a surprise visit from the Monk. Beers had been brought in and a quick naming ceremony commenced. Brynne shall now be known as Kiss My Butt for her amazing flexibility displayed at yoga while Angela was named Wax for her affiliations with Brazilian Wax.
On On.
Screamer
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